Buying forest land, implementing solar

I'm noticing the angle of the sun and the shadows as of now (peaked at 20 degrees during the summer, suspect it's near 30 degrees now), and there is quite a shadow being projected on the backyard by the trees. So, to implement solar, looks like I'd need to raise the panels some 20 feet or so off the ground for more continuous sun exposure.

I was getting concerned about the implications about this long shadow in my backyard... might be difficult growing vegetables during the non-summer months.

The other possible place to put the panels is in the front where there's a 60 foot gap with the large trees on the opposite side of the road. But that does end up broadcasting to the world "STEAL ME!", lol.

Anyway, in terms of projects, looks like solar has a place for energy expenditures for living, but not for the high energy needs of industry, so I could reasonably get something in after the more important projects like...

1) Bedroom [$750]
2) Fence to around the bedroom [$150]
3) Grid underneath the sod and bunny around the bedroom. [$150] [This might be impractical since it's shady; grass doesn't grow well in the shade?]
4) Dog, chickens [$200]
6) Lap pool [$1000]
7) Solar with support structures to raise off the ground [$500]

At the current pace, looks like I could probably afford it all after Christmas.

So far, about $1000 has been put into property improvements. I think I would actually want to put as much of my savings into [high ROI] property improvements as possible as a longterm wealth building strategy. Much of my other dollars has gone into equipment this year, I'd estimate $2000. Equipment tends to be a low ROI investment, so it's not really a solid wealth building strategy, just something necessary to get the job done.

The issue of house maintenance costs does put into perspective the time pressure for resale. I'm thinking a property I intended on building and selling would be best to sell within 5 years of the majority of new construction, to minimize the maintenance cost burden.

This particular property I don't think I'd intend for major longterm investment, I'd likely have higher ROIs in better areas with more widespread market appeal. And the lack of electric available is a major hit in terms of marketability / return on investment. [Would I see a profitable ROI after wiring electricity here? Possibly not. Example, $5000 to wire it up, increases property value by $1500.]

In my situation, property improvements (And land appreciation) seem analogous to increases in equity and appreciation in classical mortgages. It's just that, in my situation, with similar income levels, I have far more potential than someone of similar age to increase that since I don't have mortgage interest and other mortgage related "fees" and mandatory financial costs (such as full coverage insurance) sapping my income.

But, as stated, I think my property improvement dollars would be better invested in more marketable properties. So, longterm, I think I'll be capping property improvement dollars to a reasonable minimum amount fitting for the area. So maybe something like a small cabin.

Don't know what to tell you about the 'Steal me' situation. I live in what is supposed to be a good neighborhood, but I don't dare leave something in plain sight in the front yard. I literally had a guy stop and try to take a car battery from my driveway while I was standing there, I came out and caught someone trying to steal the fencing materials from the crew putting in a fence and walking back and forth. My street is the only access from one end to the other between the major roads surrounding us, so they all drive down my street, I suppose some when looking for things to steal. They even go in the backyard and steal my bikes.

But it is my understanding that most solar panel theft is of huge grids out where NOONE will see them doing it. The small number of panels they'd get at the high risk of being caught probably makes you place safer. But yeah, is anywhere really safe?

Wow, I thought there would be an unnoticeable improvement in function drinking 4 cups of cocoa a day, but on a day like today where my energy has been zapped (Tired, sleeping almost seems like all day?), definitely a noticeable improvement in alertness/energy that's for sure! This morning was particularly symptomatic, high anxiety and this feeling of urgency. Laying down seemed to help a bit, but didn't completely resolve the sensation. I went for a run last night at 8 p.m., and reactively yelled at 9:30 p.m. at the meth-head making meth in the woods at 9:30 p.m. after he predictably started shooting as I walking back to my RV from turning off the generator. I shouldn't feel like I'm walking on egg-shells walking around my property at night, jesus. I'm not doing anything while I'm here, but if I had safe harbor... I'd be interested in helping some of the 3-letter agencies out and clean up the neighborhood. (Just 30 minutes-1 hour after nightfall, start walking around the area and making noise... where you hear the gunshot is where they are.)

I probably shouldn't yell at them, but this feeling of danger at night is getting a little old. Really shouldn't be feeling unsafe right before bed. I guess I'm lucky they haven't pulled off a driveby shooting yet which would be pretty effective with the right implements.

Hmmm... just did a quick calculation on the real estate tax rate (supposed to be among the best in the state) and it appears to be 1.87%. I was reading that it was 2% yesterday for a chicago county, which doesn't make it seem all that much better, especially since chicago is supposed to be among the worst. Oh well, I guess the lower land values makes up for it, I guess. Over near the woodlands, it appears to be roughly 2%. So, real estate tax rates seem pretty much identical everywhere? Eh, I was feeling like I had a good deal in the tax rate department, lol, until I did the calculation.

I see...

They charge a tax rate for the county and then an additional tax rate for the ISD (School district), so it's not really as impressive as it seems at first blush.

So 2% of what? You don't have a house, you don't have Central AC, no power and no sewerage. So what can they tax you on? Their sure not gonna tax the trailer box. So what can it be? what is 2% of nothing?

Dan

Land values. It has proximity to a wealthy economy and excellent road infrastructure (traffic jams don't seem to be a thing here except on a few roads), so it's a bit more expensive per acre than most rural properties in Texas. I wasn't blind to the fact it was a "good location" in terms of being close to a huge, wealthy population center and the ratcheting increases in land values here year after year seems to reflect that.

Anyway, been starting the day at precisely 7:30 a.m. the last two days, and heard pistol fire at exactly 7:30 a.m. today. I took that as "You better not turn on that generator this early!", lol. So, I decided to be a little courteous and start at 7:50 a.m. (I like starting early because it allows me to start industry at 8 a.m. after I boil the cocoa.)

I usually boil the cocoa as soon as it starts in the morning, which uses 900w, the full capacity of the generator, so the generator is at its loudest as soon as it's started for the day.

Oh yeah, this is Texas, people always get up and fire shots to warn you they want to sleep in.

Oh, yeah, I'm starting to wonder if that meth head wants to kill me because I make it hard to sleep in until 11 a.m. most days, lol.

I guess I'll seriously think about creating a partial enclosure for the back half of the generator where the exhaust is.

Some 2x4s, 7/16 OSB, some nails and a jigsaw. i just need the 2x4s and a jigsaw, I might need a jigsaw eventually for construction for cutting the plywood to shape.

And what with these stupid girls that I just want to f'?

I really hope I wasn't falling for the HEB girl because she was stupid and I didn't quite realize it in person, lol. Let me think about that....

uhhhhh....

she might've been a little stupid, but her extraversion, flirtation and confidence might've hid it well, lol.

Come to think of it, maybe it's not stupidity i think is attractive, it's helplessness. The desperate and helpless damsels in distress, uh huh.

-----------------------

Thinking about how to calculate net gain (or loss) in networth with mortgaged properties.

Think it'd be something like this, over the span of year.

Increase in equity + Appreciation - Interest Paid - Fees -Insurance - Taxes - Property Maintenance Costs

Then for me... interest paid, fees and insurance would be simply 0, and "increase in equity" is simply the property improvements in terms of market(able) value.

Eventually, I might want insurance to protect against fire.

I was curious about this to see how my increase in networth compares to my peers with a mortgage. I suspect it might be comparable for this year.

Looking at the formula, there appears to be significant advantages for applying extra towards principle. Increases the annual equity increase for the year while also decreasing next year's interest. This is intuitive, yes.

-------------

And the heat of summer is returning for the next 10 days, man. 91F/71F. (It'd be 94F/78F during summer.)

It doesn't look like 84F highs are hitting until likely sometime in October. I'm not starting construction until 84F max highs become the trend (The max temperature before sweating occurs in the mosquito suit.). My neighbor was telling me that the fall/winter/early spring is the absolute best time to work outside, and I don't have trouble believing him!

And, doing a quick review of income/expenses over the last month since the new strict spending guidelines went into effect (Doesn't really feel strict now that it's become a habit)... looks like it's been pretty effective at increasing savings month-over-month.

Grocery/Fuel/Water is only allowed; dining out minimized. Durable goods purchases minimized and delayed as long as possible. Fence purchases has been the only exception over the last month.

Looks like the stronger weeks contribute in any significant sense to savings increases. The weaker weeks appear to be just treading. I already knew this with the fuel/food/water fixed expenses being some $80/week and operational fuel being some $30/week (so, baseline fixed at $110/week).

This should be the busier season for me, so normally I'd expect stronger weeks throughout the end of the year.

----------------------

And 3 TBSP of cocoa powder seems to hit the spot in terms of 'motivation' and these warm affectionate feelings in my cheeks, lol. I meant to split the cocoa drink in half this meorning, but understandably accidentally drank nearly the whole thing. I'm trying for 3 TBSP today since 5 TBSP seems to have severely affected my sleep yesterday or so it appears. Eating a little bit of peanut butter, partially letting it dissolve, and then swishing the cocoa water around... it's a pretty enjoyable combination. Just needs a good sweetener to make it more like a reese's.

I actually do wonder what affect cocoa might've had on my behavior on July 1st. Apparently a powerful multifaceted love-drug preferred by women all over according to http://www.medicinehunter.com/chocolate_love_drug .

----------------------

Anyway... I started to wonder what might this bedroom look like in comparison to tenements I've seen in the real world.

And, oh, I remember now. The extremely poor part of the black side of Atlanta, Georgia, yeppers... except they had tin roofs. Basically just a wooden box with flat tin roofs, and the wood looked pretty darn old/decaying. Saw a scantily clad female whom I suspect was a druggie walking down the sidewalk in a disjointed manner in that same neighborhood, lol. I had suspicion she might've been a crack whore, lol.

Then there's the "shotgun houses" common in many west Pennyslvania towns, appeared to be town houses.

I really want to figure out what it'll eventually turn into before starting construction, have an end goal. Because, I'm thinking I would eventually want standard siding and a roof before selling it ("bring it up to standard" so it has more market appeal -> easier and faster to sell.). I really don't want to add standard siding until it reaches its final form because I don't get the sense siding is particularly temporary.

If it was 12x8... thinking maybe for something 300+ sq ft, a small cabin... 12x32. Or maybe 12x24 would be sufficient for resale.

Saw this caucasian 20 something female driving this pearly white mustang in the hood, she looked like she had that sexy pride. She also appeared to have the glow, as if she recently made out or had some sex, the glow not very unlike what the HEB chick had directly after our encounter. (The smug smile and the warmth/glow to her complexion)

Service engine soon light is on at 131,900 miles. Not a particularly distinct mileage number to turn on, so I'm thinking some kind of sensor is turning on the light and that kind of worries me, lol. I really hope this isn't one of those "If you ignore it, the engine will die" kind of issues, lol. Because, being trapped here would be just plain awful,there's not a lot of good income opportunities (jobs) in the immediate area and there's not a lot of good groceries here either, lol. I need to get a good second vehicle to assure I'm not really trapped here and that's the next highest major-expense priority once the bedroom is built.

(major expense priority list -> fence, bedroom,2nd vehicle, solar, lap pool)

Past problems the van had: Dirty ECG valve, Clogged Fuel filter, Burnt AUX POWER fuse. None of those problems, as far I know, tripped the service light... or maybe it did. Dirty ECG valve seems to be a recurring issue so I might expect that to come back eventually, might just be that. Hopefully it'd be in the codes, need to find an autozone.

Looks like this will be another lean week judging from purchase patterns. Seems like the combination of labor day sales and the first half of the month really drained people. Trying to get into lentils, should be a cheaper source of (good?) carbs compared to bananas. I don't know if they're really good by themselves... might be best mixed with vegetables for the vitamin C for digestion.... hoping bananas will suffice for vitamin C for now because I don't have a standard vegetable purchasing pattern going. I don't really know what stores well in the heat.

Think I got it, lentils go well with limes and salt. Could be growing fresh cilantro and herbs to add. Lime should also help keep the lentils 'unspoiled' thru the day, as well as salt.

Some compelling reasons to subsist off of lentils.

http://www.whfoods.com/genpage.php?tname=foodspice&dbid=52

In a study that examined food intake patterns and risk of death from coronary heart disease, researchers followed more than 16,000 middle-aged men in the U.S., Finland, The Netherlands, Italy, former Yugoslavia, Greece and Japan for 25 years. Typical food patterns were: higher consumption of dairy products in Northern Europe; higher consumption of meat in the U.S.; higher consumption of vegetables, legumes, fish, and wine in Southern Europe; and higher consumption of cereals, soy products, and fish in Japan. When researchers analyzed this data in relation to the risk of death from heart disease, they found that legumes were associated with a whopping 82% reduction in risk!!

Click to expand...

Interesting. Seems that lentils are associated with the 'mediterranean diet' as well, along with fish and wine consumption.

I'm only subsisting off of lentils because they're cheap and have a really low insulin load and have a lot of complete(?) protein. And they only take 15-20 minutes to prepare, unlike beans which take like an hour.

Once the fence and gate is built, and minor security upgrades are implemented, immediately go job hunting. The major reason why I don't do that now is because I have some $4000 in assets that could be potentially stolen in my absence, so thus the focus on sufficient security first before I start applying.

It's interesting people need to distinguish between confidence and arrogance, often claiming the latter isn't sexy.

Let's look up this word arrogance.

http://www.dictionary.com/browse/arrogance?s=t

offensive display of superiority or self-importance; overbearing pride.

Click to expand...

I'll agree that /generally/, hostility is not sexy (especially not if aimed at the sex one might want to attract), so I guess it's not strictly true... but... display of importance or superiority (Or pride) is definitely sexy, no doubt about that. So, inoffensive displays of superiority are sexy, and it seems like there's not a particularly succinct semanteme for it.
i ls. sitting on the ground.

And, so far, lentils seem to be pretty effective. Bananas seemed to have a bit of that yoyo effect, fills for an hour or two, and hungry again. Lentils don't seem to be like that, at least not so far. So, I suspect that lentils are better for diabetes than bananas as far as carb subsistence goes.

And the lovebugs have been multiplying like crazy the last few days. Really bad today. They apparently found they could invade my RV thru the AC unit, and they have done just that in mass numbers, lol. I blocked their entry into the main cabin area (Where me and the bed is) by stapling a blanket in front of the doorway, lol. Oh jeez, I'm not talking about a handful of lovebugs in there... I'm talking about hundreds, lol. Man, what the hell am I going to do with these guys? lol.

Well, looks like the neighbor finally plugged him. I guess we were never going to believe in it until it happened.

Lovebugs have been getting crazy.

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https://www.reddit.com/r/CasualConversation/comments/33zs96/share_your_and_then_i_never_saw_himher_again/

Then I never saw her again

But for some reason, in this one instance, the one of dozens of girls who I've small-talked with while looking at something on their car, it's leaving me with lingering thoughts of "what if?" for days afterwards

Click to expand...

Huh, that's one question I purposely avoided, the "What if?". And, all the stories don't seem as progressed as mine had. "Scoring digits", maybe I should've done that, I just figured she'd be working there in the days ahead.

"What if I don't act on this great feeling swelling inside and do as my mind commands, like normal?"

Did not leave that an open question, and wow, that turned serious fast and soon had my answer, lol. "Instant girlfriend", lol.

Granted, I will have to remind that there was already great rapport between us and she was flirting upto that point, and she was weakly rejecting ("resisting") by disapproving of this town she presumed I moved to [In reality, I didn't, but that's beside the point]. My actions basically overrided her rejections and said, "No girl, this is happening", and she resisted once more with the transient nod of disapproval, and I cleared that hurdle by not changing course, and oh she just fell head over heels. I think by overriding their initial resistances, you show strength and seriousness or something along those lines, weeding out the jokers, the faintly interested/unimpassioned and the weak men.

---------------------------

Those lentils are great. I really think I should add a bit of cheese and vegetables [Because it feels like my blood sugar was likely skyrocketing surmising from that characteristic stuffy(? I don't know how to describe the sensation.) feeling in my chest], or maybe fish.

I noticed I didn't wake up this morning completely famished, as would normally be the case had I been eating bananas. And that banana did not taste insanely good like it normally would, suggesting my blood sugar is at a nice even keel (Not "Extremely low" in the case of feeling famished.). Lentils are showing good promise, now it seems the issue will be finding organic lentils... apparently conventional crops has glycophate. I wondered if they had pesticide residue, because they tasted bitter at times. I can't recall the last time organic anything has tasted bitter.

Looks like HEB has organic lentils at the equivalent price of $2.99/lb. And looks like Krogers has them packaged at $2.69/lb, good to know. Not significantly more than the bulk price of $1.79.

Looks like one pound of lentils = 2.25 cups dry.

I consumed 1 cup dry yesterday with still a little left over by the end of day, along with 5 bananas or so, so that'd suggest a daily meal cost of $1.40 from lentils. It looks like I /could/ potentially get the weekly meal costs down to probably less than $20. Wouldn't that be amazing? I've been spending like $50-$60/week on bananas and peanut butter, lol.

This should help increase my savings longterm.

Annual cost at $60/week = $3120
Annual cost at $25/week = $1300

So I end up saving roughly $1800/yr with a lentil based diet.

I do however feel insanely awake after eating that second banana this morning, lol. Bananas have a place.

----------------------------------------------

Today has started to feel awesome, lol. I'm not really sure why... is it because I started eating the lentils yesterday? Is it because I realized I could feasibly reduce my grocery trips and grocery costs significantly, thus boosting savings and income accordingly? Is it because I spotted an attractive 20-something girl who appeared to be living in this area, dispelling notions that this place was a oldpeople and sausagefest?

On the subject of reducing the food bill, there are two basic reasons why it's awesome.

1) Reduces overall costs and directly increases discretionary income and savings.
2) Significantly increases the "Time until bankruptcy" in case of earnings shortfalls, thereby increasing resiliency and longterm viability. That is, it reduces operating losses during slow periods.
------------------

I'm finding by checking up on the lovebugs every hour or so, it's like a whack-a-mole experience every hour, lol.

Yes, still feeling awesome. It's a throw up(WHOOPS, meant "toss up"... thought that sounded a little weird, lol) with the love bug whack-a-mole and the lentils.

--------------------
Looks like lentils are low in methionine, which ideally are paired with high methionine foods to make them a "complete protein".

What are those?

High methionine foods include nuts, beef, lamb, cheese, turkey, pork, fish, shellfish, soy, eggs, dairy, and beans.

Click to expand...

And apparently rice qualifies as well. (As well as corn and wheat)

I eat plenty of peanut butter, so I'm good there, I think. Cheese would also work, if it didn't melt in this environment, lol.

-----------------------
Okay, so I think I figured out this HEB girl was likely 16 or 17, still in high school. Because I just went by the highschool (Wow, all the kids have brand new cars? Do they all have jobs making monthly payments or something? Damn, brand new cars were the exception at /my/ highschool, and it was supposed be one of the wealthier areas in Spokane, lol.) and a lot of people there looked older than this girl, making me think she was 16, lol. The fact I suspected she was really young from her seeming immaturity at times, corroborates that suspicion. So... it's very plausible her parents yanked her, lol. Just why the hell was she flirting with me? lol. OK, I understand 1) she probably was looking for a boyfriend and 2) I was highly attractive at the time so... that's probably why she was flirting with me, not because she was some rational female with excellent self-control trying to make her next life move, lol. She was doing that because she wasn't really thinking about the consequences of her actions, she was compelled by instinct. "Oh look, I'm 16 years old flirting with all these grown ass men whom I know can't do anything because texas law says they'll go to jail if they try, lol." ... very likely, she didn't know the laws and she probably didn't care. She's not the one going to jail, lol.

So, as much as I would rather believe "she was the one", I was likely attracted to her youthful personality ("attracted to her youth").

It's interesting, I would have crushes back in highschool and then... it seems like I never had a crush past highschool. Kind of makes me think I'm wired to find 17 year olds attractive... ???

Which is inconvenient for a state with an age of consent of 18, lol.

Well, let's just hope there was something about her personality unrelated to her being 16 years old that hooked me. I would like to think that there's /someone/ legal out there for me, lol.

The pleasure behind that experience though... unparalleled. I don't know if that kind of pleasure can be found in older women.
-----------------

P0440 - indicates evaporative leak in the fuel tank/lines, common solution is gas cap replacement. Checked the gas cap, wasn't screwed on fully, suspect that was the source of "the evaporative leak". Screwed on fully and hopefully it should go away; might need a code reset. It is notable this code came on right after I filled up the van, so a loose gascap seems exceedingly likely.

There's always the old fashioned way.

[youtube]Nj2700em-JQ[/youtube]

Yep, the economic culture of Spokane no doubt helps produce incidences like these.

Student killed confronting gunman in Spokane school shooting

Click to expand...

https://www.yahoo.com/gma/1-dead-3-injured-washington-state-school-shooting-192805660--abc-news-topstories.html

The students here in Houston all have brand new cars, the students back in Spokane (largely lacking jobs; the part time minimum wage retail positions went almost exclusively to 20+ year olds) mostly had used cars, if they had a car at all. Young male unemployment driving violence is no doubt a thing, and I suspect this describes my illegal mexican neighbor.

So thank goodness had the good sense to get the hell out of there! Unlike my father, I was looking at the historical health and wealth of the economy before making a longterm bet. My dad went to Spokane, largely because he wanted to be within the vicinity of family in Washington and it was one of the "cheap" cities in Washington state. [The area towards the coastline near portland/Seattle and along the Columbia river is significantly pricier]

Unlike my pops... I looked at the complete picture in terms of "Wealthy economy" and "affordability". He looked almost exclusively at "affordability", at the expense of a poor local economy. [He had a pension]

Me? I was like "If I'm buying a place, I want the best starting longterm economic position I can purchase" and Houston was the answer.

Seems like I'm a lot like those wealthy chinese investors buying real estate in key American cities. Buying "good opportunities" over "Cheap places". Houston was listed as one of the go-to investment cities for chinese real estate buyers in this one news article, though I didn't see much on the upside in that particular article. (It mostly listed "Cheap labor" and "Cheap real estate" as competitive advantages.)
d
It's interesting comparing my intended path with my fathers.

He was 42 years old at the time he retired and segued into the civilian force, with both a retirement check and employment in his field.

I'd be 30 years old at the time I enter the civilian markets in my field, and my side businesses I intend on growing over the longterm. If everything works smoothly, then I'd have a fulltime income by the time I'm 32 with equivalent of a retirement check with my sidebusinesses, and growing. So potentially, I could be doing better than my pops. I do say ideally... my pops also had a wife and there's no doubt that those kinds of lady friends help make men more competitive in the job market. In what ways precisely.... I don't know... I suspect calmness, confidence, motivation, ambition, persistence. Girls definitely respond noticeably better with this aura. [And I suspect likewise. I definitely noticed the glow the pearly white mustang gal had. I was at one time pretty ignorant to this glow people were talking about in highschool, until I had imparted such an effect on the HEB chick, and having the same sensation myself, I then immediately knew what it was and I can spot it from a mile away, lol.]

--------------

Looks like neighbors started filling the huge potholes in the road with concrete rubble they hauled in on a trailer today.

Suspect they're getting the other end of the road prepared for getting whatever hauled into place onto their cleared out property. A mobile is not entirely unlikely for this area.

I personally don't like mobiles. And, well, they just simply don't work with my current terrain.
--------------
On the otherhand, I don't really know how old that girl was, her syntactic and grammatical structures seemed a little too sophisticated for a 16 year old at times. I totally understand it's very possible she was verbally gifted and not entirely unlikely, but... I just simply don't know. Her behavior and "the way she looked"(at times) was telling me 16, but her verbal ability(at times) was telling me something like 18+.

Jesus, 2.5 months, and I'm still attached to her. >.<

I don't know if this good for my soul.... it's no longer misery like when I gave up on finding her... it actually feels quite good even if I've intellectually accepted I'll never see her again. (I'm not sure if my subconscious accepts it, lol)

------------------------------

I noticed that guys like to gloat that they've never got married/wouldn't want to/etc. and the girls are either resenting them for it or telling about their wonderful marriages with the guy who married. With the fact that "I want a husband" outnumbers "I want a wife" google results by a factor of 7:4, there seems to be a clear bias against wives.

I thought about the potential source of bias. Some like to cite its feminism and the woman's lawyers that underlie the trend, and there are indeed many males that complain about being divorce raped in their lifetimes (And you don't see any women complaining about being divorced...), so there's definitely a harmful bias against males in the process, that's for darn sure.

But then I thought... why would girls insist on getting married to begin with? Are they really eyeing the divorce prize down the line? I don't think that's the initial reason for /most/ of them insisting on marriage. I think it has a lot to do with them wanting commitment, emotional and financial and otherwise, to them and their potential offspring, and the institution is believed to help ensure it. (Whether or not it actually does is another matter... case by case basis... depends on the individuals and their immediate environments in question, the immediate generational/locational/social/legal/economic environs and all. A marriage 40 years ago meant something quite different than a marriage today, there were definitely more religious undertones and the economic environment was more abundant and equitable.)

Anyway, this guy's one comment "I was left homeless for 6 months".

Oh, man, I know what you mean. I insisted on having a property that was mine alone and separate from the "common property", just in case something happened down the line,so I wouldn't be homeless. And that's what I'm imagining of this property - it's safeguard against creditors, banks and potential divorcees alike. Granted, I talk about getting married, and I laugh vehemently thinking "Yeah, right, that's not happening"... lol... so the asset protection planning might be pretty pointless, lol, but it's hypothetical if it ever happened.

I never actually thought I would get married.. but then I met the HEB chick... and I just kind of realized maybe I wouldn't be against it, lol. I can't make a solid case for marriage and I certainly wouldn't intend it as a way of keeping her locked in for life (I'm no fool, I know that marriage doesn't guarantee that), but oh... she just felt like the kind of girl I wouldn't mind being with for life. Which is saying what exactly... lol... I don't know... I don't think it's desperation speaking but maybe it is... but... i don't know how to describe it... it just felt like there was that deep meaningful life-altering connection I've never experienced with a girl. I've had girlfriends, yes, but nothing like that. I don't know if this "deep meaningful connection" is really just "crazy sexual chemistry" or something fundamentally deeper and longer lasting (Love of self as seen in others), but it definitely felt deep.

You know what... I started thinking about it...

those people who marry later than average... that does tend to suggest they'd fare worse because of something to do with presumed less "marriageability" that would be associated with marrying later?

https://ifstudies.org/blog/want-to-avoid-divorce-wait-to-get-married-but-not-too-long/



Look at that, looks like it. Looks like the sweet zone is anywhere from 28-34.



Looks like 25-34 is the sweet zone. Still looks like later marriages still fare significantly better than the young love marriage crowd, and comparable risk to the 20-24 crowd, so it's probably not too significant all in all.

[youtube]E4povfmX144[/youtube]

Dauntless said:

[youtube]E4povfmX144[/youtube]

Click to expand...

Are out of words?

He sure isn't. It seems every post it's "The HEB Chick" the more I read the more I say that he's still un loved, regardless of what he says. You know why the ratio is in the woman's favor? There are more to be married. He posts that women don't complain about a divorce, I guess you don't have any lady friends to talk to. You say the younger you marry the more chance of divorcé. You have more time together and struggle thru the young years in most cases. My struggle was middle age, at 32 I lost most of my sight. Since then we have struggled putting two daughters thru college. Now that it's time to kick back and enjoy life of what might be lest, It's gonna be hard. But after 45 years we are still together. Selling off the burdens and movin south.

If you want a girl stop chasing them away with your sexy face as you think you have. stop staring, most feel creepy about that. but if you find one that likes it, YOU better grab her while you can. Before you know it you will be a old lonely man!

[youtube]6u0DGIh3wLA[/youtube]

DAND214 said:

Are out of words?

. . . . the more I read the more I say that he's still un loved, regardless of what he says.

Click to expand...

I didn't catch where he says otherwise.

But you're wondering if *I* am out of words?

Okay, closest I can come to a H.E.B. chick story. Freshman year of college, I go to a music store at a mall. Really cute girl has started work there. At least this is the first time I've seen her there. I go in there a bit because Scott works there. He grew up less than a mile from me, but we were never in the same school, let alone class, until senior year, then we were in 3 classes together. One was music.

So I'm seeing her trying to handle a crowd. Seems these guys were ganging up on her, as though it'll do them any good. But Scott suggests he should fix me up with her. I'm warning him she's got no time for me, but he responds that I'd be surprised, she'd been talking about finally breaking up with the guy she'd had trouble peeling off her, etc. Of course I have to point out that doesn't make her interested in me. Scott acts like he can take care of it all.

What does Scott know about dating? He was on his way to marrying his original crush way back then. Strikes me as the last guy to understand this. But he insists. It's almost five on Sunday as I leave. Almost closing. Scott and the girl will be out the door shortly. Assuming he was serious, I an only wonder if he brought this up with her before he left work. It might be what, an hour after I left that he's home, walking distance for me. If I was serious I could walk over and ask, did you talk to her? Did you talk to her? Oh, I should mention that I was picturing that 'Pretty is as pretty does' might be a factor here. I'd be guessing she was a bit of a party girl. His reaction to my bring that up was I shouldn't make up my mind about her over what she might have done in high school and maybe wait until she's 20 to even begin forming lasting opinions. I mean bla bla bla, right? Even if he was right.

The whole matter of whether or not he'd tried talking to her about me would never come up. The next morning I called Scott to tell him about the article in the paper about her not making it home from work. If you know the area around Knott's Berry Farm, the Buena Park Center, La Palma, or I should say if you knew it before they built the other shopping center across the street a few years ago, you might be familiar with the way the locals would cross the street there in the middle of the block. She was mowed down and killed.

In a few days a girl from high school is threatening to be around. She doesn't live here anymore, but not long ago she came to visit and as in the past followed me around so she could just turn up and say 'Fancy seeing you here.' This being the girl, you remember how we all have one, she wouldn't have anything to do with me in high school but didn't let that stop her from having great fun saying things like. . . well, you know the girl. All that was before marrying a guy she THOUGHT for his money, but by the time I'm getting ready to graduate from college he's already lost the house he'd bought with his trust fund when he turned 18 and they were renting a garage to live in. She has gone on to be the short marriage type, she's had a few. The marriage to the guy who mercifully took her away from here was on the rocks, so she once again tried to go to her fall back position when her marriages end, which was to arrange to move in with me. She never gets to, you'd think she'd give up.

I don't think "Grab her while you can" is a good idea. Anyone I know who's done that wound up divorced. Divorced guys wind up lonely old men. I assume I'm going to. which I find preferable to being stuck with such woman who are looking for SOMEONE to ensure that she'll have a living room couch to pass out drunk on every night. There are worse things than being a lonely old man. For real.

Scott wound up sort of like in the movie 'Up.' Except they had kids. I can only guess that brass ring of a happy life together doesn't come to those who work toward it, it only comes to those who get lucky. The sheer number of women who turned up after their three marriages with kids that they needed someone to support. Or maybe the fathers never married them at all. That act like I'm supposed to be glad to see them. If I didn't have a house, would they be putting me through this? There really are worse things than being a lonely old man.

[youtube]VR8hlvLghrs[/youtube]
[youtube]9yjAFMNkCDo[/youtube]

More good research on lentil consumption.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4016088/

We identified 26 RCTs (n = 1037) that satisfied the inclusion criteria. Diets emphasizing dietary pulse intake at a median dose of 130 g/d (about 1 serving daily) significantly lowered LDL cholesterol levels compared with the control diets (mean difference −0.17 mmol/L, 95% confidence interval −0.25 to −0.09 mmol/L). Treatment effects on apolipoprotein B and non-HDL cholesterol were not observed.

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https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/24063808

Lentils were able to decrease the media:lumen ratio and media width of the aorta. The total cholesterol (TC), LDL-cholesterol (LDL-C) and HDL-cholesterol levels of rats fed the pulse-based diets were found to be lower when compared with those of the WKY rat and SHR controls (P< 0·05). Although all pulses reduced circulating TC and LDL-C levels in the SHR, only lentils significantly reduced the rise in BP and large-artery remodelling in the SHR, but had no effect on PWV. These results indicate that the effects of lentils on arterial remodelling and BP in the SHR are independent of circulating LDL-C levels.

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So, lentils were able to reduce the arterial wall thickness which I assume is a good thing. Longstanding hypertension is thought to cause increased wall thickness, reducing the lumen and bloodflow.

Cholesterols are lower.

Lentils were the only pulse capable of reducing the rise of BP in spontaneously hypertensive rats, which usually eventually die from stroke. So, essentially implies lentils were the only pulse capable of directly reducing stroke rates. [I suspect other pulses, like beans, might help reduce stroke rates when pared with other stroke-risk-raising carbs like processed carbs like chips and bread.]

Anything that reduces stroke rates, tends to have a multiplier on heart risk reduction since strokes appear harder to prevent. There are lots of things that will reduce heart risks but have no affect on stroke risk reduction.

---------------------------------

Anyway, thanks for the advice old dude. I don't stare at girls, but when she's giving me heavy signals like the HEB chick was (biting bottom lip, smiling, turning around, that sound of desperate desire in her initial tone of voice when greeting me, just the general atmosphere of feeling like literally felt like I was talking to a horny bitch in heat... a very pervasive strong feeling of "heat"... I think I could hear the desirous tone in her voice as she spoke, even though I'm not exactly sure how to describe it.), it was a move that felt exceedingly appropriate for the moment and it turned out I was right, so I don't have problems in the seduction department. And it wasn't even a stare, it was a passionate love gaze that communicated a very specific intent she understood loud and clear. Some chicks I just plain don't like from the very beginning and most chicks I just don't care about, I can't force myself to like their personality.

And, really, if I wanted to improve that scene... I need to increase feelings of "success". That basically means, as a hunter, I need to bring home more and larger game consistently. In the modern American context, that takes the form of money. I need to feel like a successful hunter to both increase my pride and desire, widening the scope of "likable females". Not just likable because I'm feeling more desirous, but also them being more likable by them seducing me for the pride they're drawn to.

I could also workout more. Not a lot of opportunities for that in the past couple months since I've put in the driveway and taken out the full extent of the forest intended to be taken down.

swbluto said:

And, really, if I wanted to improve that scene... I need to increase feelings of "success".

Click to expand...

You need to improve feelings of COMFORT. An uptight situation is a fail.

Dauntless said:

swbluto said:

And, really, if I wanted to improve that scene... I need to increase feelings of "success".

Click to expand...

You need to improve feelings of COMFORT. An uptight situation is a fail.

Click to expand...

There's definitely discomfort in poverty, lol. And in an uncertain future. Lots of certainty went out the window when the honda generator died after 6 months. Not only in the immediate impact, but the future implications therein.

Luckily it appears my neighbors are making steps to move in, so maybe they'll have electricity routed to the property within the next couple of months? Might make it easier getting hooked to the grid and allay some of those unnerving longterm viability concerns.

And then there's the "feeling safe" aspect of comfort. Don't too feel safe around illegal mexican meth-heads who've communicated mortal intent at times and then you read articles like that 22 year old nursing student who was raped and killed by a pair of early 30-something methheads, especially since I'm not on my property and there's a relatively direct line of sight from the woods in front of their property and my front door, and they clearly have demonstrated the ability to see me from within those woods without my being able to see them. If I was on my property and had thone appropriate intimidatingly loud weaponry (like 12gr shotgun and 300 grain blackpowder blank) and my vehicle was within the fenced in area which I potentially could if I could make the driveway drivable in wet conditions, I could make some improvements there. I still don't think escalating a situation is wise, but these guys don't really leave a peaceful option, they appear to be the type that need an display of aggression (A "threat display") to deter aggression.



I suspect the illegals aren't feeling especially hospitable to gringos with Trump in power.

Coincidentally, this all plays into the "provider"/"protector" aspect of being an attractive male. (Present and future) Needs taken care of and feeling safe and sound.

My overall comfort is definitely much improved over west-coast affording-to-merely-live anxieties.


-------------

Anyway, this morning, kept getting that saliva spray that felt like it was coming up or something, don't know if it was related to acid reflux or pulmonary edema. Definitely felt like some kind of 5-second angina during the peak this morning, though I didn't notice it too much since I was much more focused on the pleasure, only in retrospect did I question "What was that?", lol. Apparently ate a TON OF FOOD this morning, so early morning hypoglycemia was not too improbable (the link between hypoglycemia and heart health is well-established). I'm guessing the prolonged speed walking yesterday might've used up much of those resources during sleep for muscle repair. Slept for 2 hours, woke for 2 hours, slept for 2 hours, woke for another 2 hours, slept another 2 hours, last night, kind of unusual. All symptoms seemed to disappear after eating a ton of food,lol.

https://sports.yahoo.com/floyd-mayweather-defends-trumps-controversial-locker-room-talk-013634805.html

Someone mentions that objectifying of women in "locker talk" happens pretty much everywhere where men are. He says he doesn't necessarily agree with it but... I'm like... dude... girls love being used as sexual objects by men who aren't apologetic and/or ashamed about it. That's just some feminist bullshit designed to neuter you of your attractive masculinity.

http://charlessledge.com/women-want-mans-sexual-plaything/

Women want to submit to men in the same way that men want to take possession of beautiful women physically. It is a naturally and healthy reaction. Women want to be lost in a man’s passion, dominance, and power. They want to be swept away by it and know that they are at least in part the cause of it. They want to be devoured by their man in the bedroom. Women want to be taken and ravished.

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Exactly, that HEB chick loved being swept away by the impassioned demands foisted on her. That girl looked like she was f*cking excited/happy to find someone like me who wouldn't take no for an answer and went straight for the kill. Granted, I don't know if she's like "most women", per se... but... more than likely... she probably is, lol. /At least in that manner/ ... being swept away by unapologetic impassioned desire.

I like what that one person said, learn not from what women say they want, but from what they do. Oh yes, most women don't really know what they want... the mindless ones, which seems to be most of them, repeat the same 'unoffensive' feminist mantra that everybody else hears, as wrong as it is.

And, oh... let's see here... what might've been the HEB chick hoping... she was probably hoping I'd come back and we'd go have some sex. That excitement as I was leaving tells me she thought she had me as a boyfriend, and the pelvic thrust definitely told me her desire.

swbluto said:

Dauntless said:

swbluto said:

And, really, if I wanted to improve that scene... I need to increase feelings of "success".

Click to expand...

You need to improve feelings of COMFORT. An uptight situation is a fail.

Click to expand...

There's definitely discomfort in poverty, lol. And in an uncertain future.

Click to expand...

Not that it isn't important, but that's not what I mean. Just plain they have to be comfortable around YOU. Coming off as with your picture of yourself there is a bad thing.

swbluto said:

Exactly, that HEB chick loved being swept away by the impassioned demands foisted on her.

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The problem is you don't know anything about that. Yet you tell yourself you do. That's detrimental.

[youtube]55_bV4ORRFM[/youtube]

Dauntless said:

swbluto said:

Exactly, that HEB chick loved being swept away by the impassioned demands foisted on her.

Click to expand...

The problem is you don't know anything about that. Yet you tell yourself you do. That's detrimental.

[youtube]55_bV4ORRFM[/youtube]

Click to expand...

I was there, you weren't. Case closed.

And... do I still need this context... she was throwing herself at me. Lots of girls at the time were, btw, it wasn't really strange behavior on her part. What set her apart was she was more effective at flirting than the other girls were, I guess. She had... I don't know how to describe it... high quality female personality attributes. She had the kind of suave a popular girl at my old highschool would've had (Which then did make me question if she was the popular girl at her highschool... lol. The idea of me seducing the hot popular girl, as I had done, seemed a little unreal.)

Chicks love being swept away by passionate hungry ravenous wolves and being taken captive. I don't see what's controversial about that, a whole genre of books around that.

Some might deplore trapping the captured, but reality isn't always fair, and sometimes(many times?) the captivated like it that way otherwise it may never have happened.







Highland Captive

New York Times bestselling author Hannah Howell breathes life into the enchanting beauty of the Scottish Highlands in this epic romance between a strong-willed captor and the striking young woman he both confines and protects.

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Look, a theme of trapping and then protecting the girl. Doesn't that seem familiar?

swbluto said:

I was there, you weren't. Case closed.

Click to expand...

No, I don't think you were. You were imagining it.

swbluto said:

Chicks love being swept away by passionate hungry ravenous wolves and being taken captive. I don't see what's controversial about that, a whole genre of books around that.

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Ah, like all the 'Star Trek' novels. Ever consider joining Star Fleet. Maybe you could develop a taste for greenies. Captain Kirk loved them.

You know, I noticed perusing urbandictionary.com's popular girls entry and seeing http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=popular%20girls .

I found that "slut", "bitchy" and "cheerleader" were all mentioned pretty often. I noticed walking thru the HEB parking lot, a number of vehicles with "Color Guard" bumper stickers. So, in light of this HEB chick having personality traits that seemed common with popular girls (She was suave, really effective flirting ability, mental fortitude, extraversion, sociable, affectionate and tenacity. She could've been "slutty" and "bitchy" to someone who knew her history more... I could detect clues of those traits at times. Slutty for her so willingly having sex with me, bitchy being what stirred the passions; I think being bitchy communicates "I'm unsatisfied, satisfy me".), it seems plausible there may be a tradition of hiring cheerleaders/color-guard at this particular HEB during the summer. Coincidentally, I did notice the color guard performing after school in a sectioned off part of the parking lot and I'd suspect there were 80-100 cheerleaders or so. So, if this girl was a cheerleader, and if she were not quite a senior as I might suspect, it's not unlikely she's practicing in the color guard after school.

On the topic of bitchy = "I'm unsatisfied, satisfy me" [it's interesting the root word "bitch" is in it, alluding to the sex; looks like being bitchy happens to woman during their period; and it looks like women are at their most fertile on the day of ovulation. So, being bitchy = "frock me while I'm at my most fertile" seems fitting. By extension, bitchy=horny.]

[youtube]a0fkNdPiIL4[/youtube]

Anyway, pure speculation. And, if this were true, lol, I'm not pushing it, lol. I don't have anything against hot cheerleaders (I obviously prefer them over the weaker girls) but my mental state at the moment isn't really quite prepared for encountering a popular cheerleader in her natural habitat. You need to really think highly of yourself and be impervious to their attempts to bring you down a notch. The moment they sense weakness or fear, like a dog, is when they attack and oh, do they probe the boundaries. And, seeing a parking lot full of new vehicles, could potentially make me feel inadequate with my ride if the issue were brought up or thought about. I honestly don't think much about it, since I feel accomplished having 100% ownership of a fully-functioning vehicle with some good life left in it, and it suits my HAULING-IN-CRAP needs well of which there's been a lot of that.

It's pretty fitting my having the Women, you need to know your place sentiment with her hypothetically being a popular cheerleader. She probably did think highly of herself.

And, it appears color guard and cheerleading are two different things. Yeah, okay, they seem to be roughly the same thing to me. Maybe that's because they seemed to be practicing together?

Anyway, found out from a thread online that the locked eyes phenomenon creates incredible 'sexual tension'.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_tension

Sexual tension is a social phenomenon that occurs when two individuals interact and one or both feel sexual desire, but the consummation is postponed or never happens. A common scenario is where the two individuals function in close proximity, such as co-workers or in a group of friends, but do not have sex to avoid awkwardness or for other reasons. Another common scenario is when two people's attraction is limited to physical, with there being no emotional attraction.

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In particular, the look I gave wasn't a simple "locked eyes" phenomenon... nope... it was definitely adamant and straight to the point. Could explain her dramatic reaction I can't seem to find examples of /anywhere/ online.

-----------------------

Hmmm... well today was interesting. Met this girl I indirectly showed some sexual aggression towards in the past, and you could hear the infatuation in her trembling voice.

Isn't that interesting?

The other girl who showed extremely high levels of infatuation was the HEB chick (So much so, she became my girlfriend for the day, lol), whom I directly showed HIGH LEVELS of sexual aggression towards.

Isn't that interesting?

Sexual aggression towards girls -> Them becoming infatuated.

Didn't know it was that straightforward, but it sure is awfully convenient to know about. So I have two distinct datapoints confirming this trend and the HEB chick wasn't the exception, not by any means. So, apparently girls want to be conquered by guys who go directly for what they want. Could explain the difference between jocks and the betas; jocks go for the kill and often do, betas stand back, make excuses (Oh, look at the woe-is-me tales I've been seeing recently...) and beat off.

Obviously you don't have to be a jock to "go for the kill", but stop making excuses and stop holding yourself back is an important step.

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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence

The physiological correlations of intense limerence can include seizure-like trembling, pallor, flushing, heart palpitations, pupil dilation and general weakness. Awkwardness, stuttering, shyness, and confusion predominate at the behavioral level.

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Interesting. Yes, the HEB chick was definitely very limerent during my advance and especially so during my rejection. ("seizure-like trembling" in particular.)

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http://theweek.com/articles/448643/how-flirt-according-science

How to flirt, according to science

Pretty comprehensive article that seems pretty much on the mark.

You may need to amp it up, even if that makes you a bit uncomfortable.

Research shows that women are more successful in their flirting when they're more direct.

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Definitely seems to true among men as well. Direct and "amp'd up" definitely described my advance, lol, and she obviously wasn't falling until /that/ happened. In fact, she seemed initially delightfully surprised when I made that move... I'm not so sure if it was because she wasn't aware of my interest or she just didn't expect me to have those kind of balls.

--------------------

Anyway, seems like my weekly food bill was $33 this week with the lentil based diet (Down from $50/week). However, it seems there was an uptick in hypoglycemic episodes and associated events (like tiredness, angina during high physical activity stress like ejaculation and lifting heavy weights.), so I'm not sure what needs to be addressed. I guess I could be eating more vegetables, but I figure I'll be harvesting that in 4 months or so from my garden.

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One thing I can't quite settle with the HEB chick. Was she two faced? She seemed too non-sophisticated/transparent for being two faced, but she seemed to change her tunes a bit when I left the space near her as if to please the next customer in line ... yeah... I just don't know.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=two%20faced

The person is also usually a brown noser, as they try to please whomever they meet. In an effort to be accepted by the entire world, a "two faced" person will socially accomodate anyone they meet in an attempt to be popular and liked by everyone. More often than not, however, two faced bitches are usually covering up their assholism.

Click to expand...

Oh, this would fit into the "Popular girl" hypothesis, mhmmm. Yes, so, it is definitely possible. I guess it's possible to be transparent and "Please whoever is in front of you" at the sametime, but would require a lack of strong/stable feelings in a sociopathic like manner [Of course, it's possible she was transparent with me, but was not-as-transparent with the next guy at that particular moment. Yes, she did seem to be pretending at that particular moment given the obvious exaggeration and I could see through her false implications. I would call it lies, but it was a misleading suggestion as opposed to a misleading statement. She wasn't false about the explicit, but the implicit. What I didn't know at the time was the motivation - was she trying to make me jealous? Trying to hurt me because she thought I had hurt her? Research suggests she was trying to make me jealous [reduce perceived availability] in order to secure my commitment. But... you know... as much as it doesn't seem fitting for the emotions she was experiencing at the time... she might have been trying to hurt me but I didn't take it that way.]. A number of women seem to be sociopaths at their core... I wouldn't say most... but the more attractive ones tend to be. [If she were a sociopath or 'asshole', she might have been trying to hurt me. Except I wasn't.]

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I actually do wonder if the HEB chick started her period that day, lol. Maybe that's why it felt like I was talking to a bitch in heat, she was literally in heat, lol.

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well this is straight to the point.

http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2011/11/can-staring-into-someones-eyes-make-them-fall/

How To Make A Girl Fall In Love With You

So the title is “How To Make A Girl Fall In Love With You” but this actually works for men or women.
Stare into their eyes. Yup, that’s it. It dramatically increases the chances of love:

Click to expand...

Funny how I didn't really intellectually know this... but it almost seems like my instinct really did. And did that love come gushing out, like a dog whose owner just returned from a weeklong vacation, lol.

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Oh yes, that's what I heard when I was leaving today, the frustrated sigh.

[youtube]JXsz8wmM1V8[/youtube]

Frustration typically follows an unsuccessful attempt according to https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/brain-babble/201304/why-do-we-sigh .

Ok, that brings up the question, what was attempted? To make me fall madly in love and woo her, yes.

Don't ask me what the HEB girl had that this girl didn't. Definitely something personality related. To be sure, I'm not attracted to the vast majority of girls. That's partially why encountering the HEB girl, I knew I was encountering someone rare (someone I was smitten by), and so I simply had to make a move regardless of the then practicality.

-----------------------

So, let's say I'm wired to find particular 16 year olds attractive and it's been that way ever since I've been in highschool and this is a common sentiment.

That does suggest that, maybe, guys are supposed to find their sweetheart during highschool (That 'critical window') and those who don't are doomed to a life of loneliness and despair. There are a few guys I'm aware of that followed this path, marrying their highschool sweetheart, the one I'm thinking of in particular works at Microsoft, and i'm only aware of him through being aware of his girlfriend who was in the "highschool circle of friends" of my sister, who knew them through choir. Anyway, that's hypothetical.

i don't think it's entirely true, because there appears to be guys who find older mates, but I wonder if they're actually smitten or do they just give up on having that feeling as a requirement?

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Looking up the phrase "delightfully surprised" as that seemed to be her initial reaction upon noticing my visage, I found https://english.stackexchange.com/questions/95980/is-there-a-word-meaning-unexpected-pleasure and this was the top answer.

To some extent, breathtaking may serve. This adjective has senses “stunningly beautiful; amazing” and “Very surprising or shocking; to such a degree as to cause astonishment”, which taken together might mean surprising and pleasing.

Click to expand...

Interesting, her "overwhelmed by beauty/tinged by sadness" reaction has much overlap here (especially "stunningly beautiful"), and breathtatking was literally how she was reacting in the moments to follow ("trying to catch her breath"). So, it's curious the tremendous amount of literal overlap in her reaction with this answer.

That heavy sexual tension, yowza, I think that's what lead to the heights of ecstacy for that day and many days following. It seems like a number of people don't agree with the idea of "if you've never experienced romance, you don't know what you're missing"... telling me... they've likely never subdued and seduced a hot girl in a manner like that [Of course, maybe they don't consider that romance... lol]. I sure as hell know I hadn't until it happened.

I kind of wonder if mdma, ecstasy, leads to a similar experience?

I'm seeing description of this drugs' effects, and I'm seeing descriptions like "glimpses of a reality I never fully knew existed", precisely the way I've described that encounter, telling me affects of ecstasy are probably pretty much very similar. In other words, this sensation is probably purely a neurochemical phenomenon, and not-so-much /just/ a "I just found the love of my life" phenomenon as I might've assumed. (Granted, it is very possible that's true as well, and the neurochemical phenomenon is simply the operating mechanism.)

I also saw "One of the happiest days of my life" in the effects of MDMA, coincidentally the way I and she both felt about that particular day.

I'm willing to bet that girl likely experienced that "Glimpse of a reality I never knew existed" phenomenon. I've had sexual experiences with girls, but nothing like that. Nothing so intense and sudden (And she obviously was experiencing ecstasy).

-----------------

You know, I remembered this guy once opining "Why can't love be like so intense and sudden like it feels?", as infatuation often goes.

LOL, I guess he just wasn't well-positioned and didn't know how to go about it the right way. You might also need the "right kind of girl" for it to work, like maybe... a tries-to-please-everyone slut or something, lol. [Behaving like a desireable male likely has something to do with it. Acting privileged and entitled and just taking what's yours. I think many women turn into sluts around desireable men.]

-----------------

Anyway, started using a baby lemon in my rice/lentils today. Had to pair it with fish, seemed like the rice was going to go bad fast, lol, and the insulin load would've been excessive without the paring. It felt like there was too much rice, so I'd probably go for dry 2/3cup lentils and 1/3cups rice, and i should get full sized lemons next time. (Lemon taste detectable but faint)

And eating that entire lemon raw was delicious. Slice in half and remove the skin and just eat the lemon, lol.

And for an appropriate fat, I think maybe I'll start buying coconut shreddings again and trim down the peanut butter consumption. Seems like it'd be easier to implement coconut shreddings with the lentils than peanut butter. Organic peanut butter has gotten pretty expensive.

I think I could probably add peanuts to the lentils like the chinese do with their dishes, but I get peanut butter for the bananas.

-----------------

You know, that scientific "how to flirt" talks about how males use space-maximization and displays of social dominance such as non-reciprocated touching of males (playful nudging of ribs, etc.) to convey their attractiveness.

I thought about that and I'm just like, yeah, I'm not the kind of guy that goes out of my way to touch other guys, that just seems weird (i assume they're doing it to his buddies and not random strangers? that's a little less weird.). As to would I let other guys touch me... oh... lol... any guy that tried would get his face cratered in, lol. Does that indicate "dominance", I dunno... maybe I just don't like being touched...but to some extent, I think it does. Guys that try to assert their dominance over me typically get stern warnings, rarely has it escalated to use of force but if it did... I guarantee my tenacity would see it to the end.

--------------------

kind of suspect my health is going downhill. The morning cardiac phenomenon has been pretty consistent the last 4 days or so, and sleeping at night is pretty broken and I've been taking frequent long naps throughout the day. Won't dwell on it, take each day as it comes and focus on the medium and longterm plans like normal.

---------------------

Anyway, now thinking about the interior of the bedroom. I thought maybe I'd drywall, plaster and then paint... but that does make it "Less temporary" and not as easy to extend. Apparently they used to use thin wood panels and plaster but it was laborious and costly.

So, I thought about the purpose of drywall / wood panels as a whole.

I think it comes down to...

1) Hides the studs
2) Hides/Keeps the insulation in place.
3) Possibly protects the sheathing.

1,2)->Improves interior appearance.

Drywall has the additional benefit of increasing fireproofness. Fires started inside the house won't as easily/quickly spread to the frame and engulf the entire house.

So I thought about the climate here... and I'm like...

Insulation is a drawback (This climate definitely DOES NOT NEED insulation, lol, especially not in wooden buildings. Insulation might be desirable if one planned on running A/C, otherwise, with fan cooling, it is totally a drawback. You don't want to keep heat in the building during the warmer months(apr1-oct10), especially not at night. That's one of the problems of the RV, with the insulation, it retains heat too well at night.) and if the studs were painted over so they didn't look like "Raw pine studs", I don't think I'd mind them.

So I think I'll opt to not implement the interior walls during the initial expansionary stage. Once it reaches a semi-final form, I think I'll add the more permanent features like the interior walls, siding and permanent roof.

And, I think I'll go big with this property. I can always stop wherever I'm at in development and this property has the added advantage of being $10,000 closer to finished development. I don't like that my neighbors appear to be a drug manufacturer/distributor family and that they either seem to have a murderous methhead or mercenary on the payroll and they seem to be territorial far beyond their own property.

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AND... I just saw a male mexican kid and female mexican kid with her bike walk by and the guy was swinging a pvc pipe (Dog protection I'd guess)....

They walked to the intersection out of sight, then about a minute later, the kid had a white sack with goodies in his hand walking back my way and he had this smile on his face like "Oh, look what I'm getting away with."

I swore I saw a white sack with goodies on that guy's property, and I'm willing to bet it's not there any more.

I think just witnessed theft and I didn't realize it until a minute later, lol.

Yep, mexican thieves in our midst, uh huh.

And I think I know where this kid lives, too, lol.

Should I tell the neighbor the next time he comes by?

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http://elitedaily.com/dating/gentlemen/seduce-hot-girl/

Interesting, this piece seems to assume "Hot girl" almost exclusively means beautiful girl.

That's one thing the HEB chick wasn't, at least not strikingly so to my person. At times, she looked "pretty", but I think it was more the genuine smile that was prettier than her actual looks. [Her initial fake smile should've set off alarms as to someone who would've been potentially two-faced to my person, but my glibness at the time seemed to pretty easily remove the fakeness, so I didn't think much of it[Well, actually, her smile turned genuine once I shifted the conversation to the bagger,and she coo'd, so I'm guessing maybe that increased her interest. I just really couldn't keep looking at her with that fake smile, lol.]. That's one thing I've learned, beware colleagues with the fake smiles; usually contempt and daggers are not far behind. That's one reason why I'm not so sure she was trying to (fakingly) please the next customer and make me jealous or she was really as treacherous as she seemed. Assuming the depths of her emotions actually meant something and her excitement at the very end didn't just suddenly change on the dime, I'd assume the former, but... I don't really know if she had strong persisting feelings. Her feelings might've been as mercurial as her personality seemed to be. She might've disregarded her feelings in pursuit of other possible objectives like finding a wealthy sugardaddy.]

Anyway, this piece kind of seems like it might be right - For sure, I never mentioned her looks to her because it never even really crossed my mind to any significant degree; and what exactly would I say to someone that looks 'hot'? "You look hot" sounds effing retarded. She had a "hot personality", confidence and charm and she had nonverbal suave. And that short-temper, oh gosh... lol... I don't know if she realizes how hot that is. And, she might've been an oddball, but apparently an adorable oddball. i think just about everything she said/did turned me on. I'm swooning just thinking about "The way she sounded" and her care-free and fun-loving personality, lol. [anyway, i'm thinking she's not likely a strong christian. Which is by no means something I disapprove of, lol.]

In contrast, the kroger chick "looked hot" but I didn't like her weak personality.
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seems like the minivan's been overheating recently. i suspect the lovebugs have been clogging my grill, causing it to easily overheat.

Added the coconut shreddings to the rice/lentils, delicious (the savory meaty flavor of the lentils and rich fatty taste of the coconut complement each other well). The tangy lemon taste as an ending note in the taste is pretty neat. And, wow, that lemon is burning the cut on my hand, lol. (strong antiseptic)

Anyway, didn't notice myself eating a lot of bananas yesterday, but I did have 3 lemons. Not sure how the lemons might've contributed. Could've been the fish I consumed with the lentils/rice.

Lemons are commonly prescribed for detoxing a liver, might have implications for the heart.

Anyway, kind of excited about getting the bedroom built and having myself a mosquito-free "proper office". I think I would want savings just a little bit higher to ensure to have at least a comfortable minimum after all expenses, so I don't know how that's going to be ensured. That's one of things severely affecting my productivity, I lack a proper office (My bed doesn't provide the right kind of environment, lol, it makes me too comfortable.).

The shed provides good storage capabilities, so it's not entirely useless.

The girls are definitely signalling they're available lately, lol, but I'm not really looking for a girl at the moment. There's too many upcoming expenses to ensure my mood will be stable enough for a girl. Further, I get the sense that lots girls expect "allowances" or effective equivalents? I don't have room right now to give anyone an allowance, lol, much higher priority savings targets like my bedroom, lap pool, the garden and the such. (This idea of an allowance sounds like prostitution which I don't have anything morally against, just seems hypocritical the former is often considered far more moralous over the latter, probably by the same man-using women. Anyway, I've heard that prostitutes are often cheaper than women, but how true is this... probably true for wives... but girlfriends? I guess certain girlfriends might tend to be more expensive than others, lol.)

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4977979/

Effect of Garlic and Lemon Juice Mixture on Lipid Profile and Some Cardiovascular Risk Factors in People 30-60 Years Old with Moderate Hyperlipidaemia: A Randomized Clinical Trial

Results showed a significant decrease in total cholesterol (changes from baseline: 40.8 ± 6.1, P < 0.001), low-density lipoprotein-cholesterol (29.8 ± 2.6, P < 0.001), and fibrinogen (111.4 ± 16.1, P < 0.001) in the Group 1, in comparison with other groups. A greater reduction in systolic and diastolic blood pressure was observed in Group 1 compared with the Groups 3 and 4 (37 ± 10, P = 0.01) (24 ± 1, P = 0.02); respectively. Furthermore, a great reduction in body mass index was observed in the mixed group compared with the lemon juice and control groups (1.6 ± 0.1, P = 0.04).

Click to expand...

Lemon and garlic appear pretty healthy. Decrease in BP of 24 with lemon vs a reduction of 37 with lemon and garlic? That's powerful.

Looks like the garlic+lemon group (Group 1) had the advantage in total cholesterol, ldl and fibrinogen, suggesting garlic is instrumental in those parameters. Fibrinogen seems to be used in clotting, so reduced fibrinogen would lead to a lower likelihood in clotting.

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It's interesting in the days following the HEB chick encounter, I was feeling periodically suicidal.

I haven't ever since.

I wonder why that was the case? By all means, it looked I had her in the bag. Was is the (sexual) frustration of being pinned down to my property during the daytime by the thief that led to that?

https://www.suicideforum.com/community/threads/what-role-does-sexual-frustration-play-in-depression-suicide.15093/

Seems that sexual frustration does lead directly to suicidal feelings, yes, so the thief might've been instrumental there.

Granted, if her parents yanked her, likely would've had the same outcome. If I had found that out sooner which would've been the case had I been making daytime trips, likely would've despaired much sooner, and got over her faster. Considering the fantasy was exceedingly enjoyable, I can't really say that would've been the ideal outcome, so... all in all... the thief might've inadvertently helped me out. (At least in that way)

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The cynical people on UD decrying the redundant nature of the term "fun loving". Lol, I swear to god, it's not redundant because there's A LOT of people who shun fun even if they hypothetically enjoy it in very specific contexts/ways, let me count the types.

-Depressed people
-Anxious people
-The suppressed low status people (I.e., military subordinates, everyone other than the popular girls according to an urbandictionary entry, lol)
-Bitter complaining people
-Nuns
-Most christians, lol
-Feminists

Oh, yes, there's a whole lot of people that aren't exactly "Fun loving", lol.

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Guy on reddit talking about he got freaked out of this astrophysics graduate student's suggestion to meet up in a secluded nature area to watch the supermoon.

I'm like...

okay, we're talking about a female astrophysicist, considering how rare those are, she likely has impaired understanding of "the acceptable norms". Further, she wants to look at the moon, which is exceedingly fitting for her field.

I'm just thinking... dude... she might not actually be setting you up for murder/robbery, lol.

But, if she is the type that doesn't really understand what would freak people out, and he was "normal" which he appeared to be, they likely wouldn't have personalities that meshed well anyways, so he probably didn't miss much on his part.

If it were me and I were interested in this girl, I'd explain why I wouldn't be comfortable with that right off the bat, because she might need the explanation. If she refuses to meet in a public location after the explanation, yeah, effing red flags all over the place,lol.

--------------------------

Anyway, this HEB chick, with her short-tempered nature. She reminded me a lot of that Anime club girl back in highschool I had a faint crush on (At the time, it was more like "You're interesting" rather than a crush). So I wondered... what would this girl act like if I had made a move on her... and I found out. delightfully surprised/astonished, a voluptuous dramatic reaction, someone that was begging for my acceptance and desperately clinging onto this rare opportunity that she rarely if ever sees, excited happy little girl and so on. Probably one of the happiest days in her life, and definitely mine.

Just thinking about that anime club girl acting like a happy little girl like she had... just bewildered me... because that was definitely not her persona as far as I knew. But, I never actually seen the anime club girl fall in love (No one approached her as far as I knew), so I never really knew all the sides to her personality. Anyway, it was interesting finding out the answer to "what if I had seduced the anime club girl"... didn't know how to do that at the time... so... it's kind of a moot question... but still, I wondered because our paths never intersected and having came across this girl that reminded me of her, I had the rare opportunity to answer the question of "what if?".

I think her short-tempered nature was a front. Something to do with hedgehog's dilemma. Maybe she was angry because she never received romantic interest, unlike the other girls. I could hear the desperation in her voice when I first met her, so this isn't entirely unlikely. Once the short-tempered veil was pierced, another personality emerged, possibly her 'real self', a side to the anime club girl I never saw and most didn't as well. A happy contented anime club girl, lol.

Anyway, I did seriously think there was a real chance at the time shortly after, that she was going to have some babies. Not just one of those "comfortable" girlfriends, but "mother of my children" kind of girlfriends, lol [I suspect this is where I was thinking marriage might've been realistic. Not that out-of-wedlock babies are impossible... but... I have some significant reservations about my having out-of-wedlock-babies and I'm not so sure it's the stigma or the practicality or what... no doubt the stigma is there...]. Not that I was planning it per se, but it felt like that level of seriousness. So I checked out what it would cost... about $10k in the USA. Dang, lol. I saw that the UK suggests doing it at home as a possibility, though it recognized an increased risk of complications for first-timers.

Okay, removed the front grill of the van, and cleaned off the ladybug'd radiator with a wire brush. Unlike the "power washer" and "air blower" methods suggested, this did the trick just as well and didn't take that long either. Hopefully the van should stop overheating now, lol. I noticed radiator fluid was leaking from the front likely because it was overheating, so I think I might need to add more fluid; I will if it continues to overheat.

Anyway, it's good I took care of it at the first sign of real trouble instead of blowing it (As soon as the temp gauge hit the "overheating" zone, i immediately slowed down to pull over to let it cool.). Because, an overheating engine could lead directly to a blown headgasket, which essentially kills the engine/vehicle.

Anyway, it's interesting that ladybugs could cause a blown headgasket. Never really fully understood the conditions under which blown headgaskets occur other than "overheating engine", but that made it pretty obvious one possible way.

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I think about the atmosphere the HEB girl experience created.

It felt like I was talking to... someone I was really felt like I was at home with. A deeply comfortable feeling, like a pervasively warm deep feeling. The vast majority of people don't have that kind of effect. Anyway, I don't know if this just happens to be one of her personality characteristics (A "warm" person), or we just meshed so well psychologically, it had that kind of effect, but it was enveloping and so hard to ignore. I don't exactly know if this was before or after I made my move... actually... I'd say it was there shortly after we started talking... I think probably as soon as she bit her lip... lol.

I'm not really sure if there's a common adjective for that characteristic. "Down to earth"? I don't know if I considered her down to earth, lol. Honestly, I really have no idea by what people mean by "Down to earth" other than possibly "Really boring".