I walked about 5 miles tonight. I had to leave my own apartment after paying $650 for rent. I wanted to murder my downstairs neighbor.
Because he disrespected me and did something I would never do to him. "treat others as you want to be treated" He was drinking and I straight. He came up drunk and wanting to argue with someone. I was not in a good mood and stated "Now is not the time. I really do not feel like an argument. I was already in a bad mood and mad at someone else. He failed to listen and continued running his pie hole.
When I started losing control I removed myself from the situation. The injustice is it should have been the other way around. He was in my house. Not vice versa. I felt like doing extreme violence but he is like a brother to me and he has a family.
I know I did the right thing really but hope I can continue this here but am old and getting tired of all of it. I need out of New York. They don't like e bikes here anyway.
Thanks for being a friend. All of you. I can easily handle a little constructive criticism. But the blatant disrespect I suffer here where I live from so called friends continues to infuriate me. The dude knows I have a heart condition. I have an aneurysm and leaky valve (backflow) That is no way to treat a friend.
You guys are my best friends. I am of superior intelligence than everyone I know except you guys here on ES. I learn positive things from you all. Here where I live I just learn how to hate. That is not good. Thanks again.
PS. Only the quiet helps. Why I sleep all day. I stay awake until everyone sleeps then finally sleep and hold my ol lady and 6 to 9 hours in an air conditioned room. The most peaceful moments of my life until I awake and have to deal with another day of other peoples BS.
I am considered by my family to be lazy and live off the system. I am 53 and collect free money from the government. People can't understand me. They think different I guess. They don't think about the PAT TRUE guy who hired me when I got out of prison and met my ol lady back in 1997. He called me Gomer. and talked down to me. Called me names. In front of the other workers for his amusement.
I bench pressed 375 back then and 315 for 6 times. Fresh out of prison. Job was $5 bucks an hour and the guy owed me 30 bucks. He had a flat tire and was behind him. No one else on the road. It Haunts me daily a I wanted to bash his head in with tire iron but instead I helped him and quit the job. Took partial pay and did without. I lost my car, No insurance money. I wanted to be with my ol lady more than I wanted blood.. He owes me $35. I want my money. Dude was from Redhook. Kingston area. He better p[ray to his higher power I never see him.
I worked dish washing over 10 years. Was the scapegoat. everything was blamed on me and was yelled at for dishes as took to long unclogging their toilets.. Yes I could probably physically work today at 53. However may impose a safety threat/hazard to a boss/employer who chooses to disrespect me and talk down.
I am only human and have limitations. They have been pushed about as far as possible without tragic results. Unfortunately I guess other people can't accept that. I thank you all for accepting me for who I am.
I build e bikes. There not always pretty or practical but sometimes they work, at least for awhile. Immortality is not a dream but the future of our evolution. We were given the tools to forge our own destiny. We were created in gods image and shall evolve to live forever.