Buying forest land, implementing solar

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Jeez, the department is called "Trust", it's ironic that's the one thing they seem to lack.
 
"They" being people like Dan who won't just trust you to use a ripsaw?

So are you saying that fiverr kicked you off? Hey, since you're no longer needing to concern yourself with us competing with you, it's time to tell us what the hell you've been babbling about all this time. How do I search to find the guy offing bad line drawings? It's not like we can offer suggestions if we don't know what you do.

And what is the difference with level 1 seller, level 2, top rated seller, etc.? How does that relate to the $1,400 you think you won't be paid?

https://www.fiverr.com/vdrawpainting/create-a-line-drawing-of-your-photo-in-black-and-white?context&context_referrer=search_gigs&context_type=auto&pckg_id=1&pos=32&ref_ctx_id=9d5b2f11-e55b-4800-914a-4068b573b1ba&funnel=398950b1-169f-4306-9856-1588276a0e75

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That one dream I had of the HEB chick shipping off to become an army medic...

And I might have broke her heart. The evidence was strong she was in love (of some kind).

boyfriend-broke-my-heart-joined-the-army.jpg
 
Okay, so the spectre of marginal or no income despite significant savings is setting in.

Sure, I can calculate a "going broke" rate of some 5 years. Comforting right?

NOT REALLY!

I'm finding that little to no income produces significant anxiety, in spite of savings.

So financial well being requires both income to sustain living expenses and savings.

If anyone is missing, anxiety and its cousins (Like depression) tend to set in.

Could explain why retirement of the little to no income kind tends to be a death sentence. The sustained anxiety, with the higher cortisol level, makes some kind of mortal clotting event a ticking time bomb in many older people.

So income is really one of the main keys to attracting a mate, yes it is. That's what those girls meant by "have a job", have some kind of income. You can be broke, and still have income, just like that Black Beatles rapper rapped about, and still lay the ladies, as he sung about.

I'm finding that doing construction work tends to sooth the anxiety, the physical labor part seems to anyway.
 
No no, you don't get to talk like all that. You're the one expressing this great need to prove yourself, Sessile. Employment has been a roller coaster for me, investing rounded of the corners some but not completely, yeah it's been rough.

Anyway, Sessile---(May I call you Ses?). Anyway, Ses, you need to get back to thinking about all those local job prospects you were talking about before.
 
Great need to prove myself? Lol. I only want to be as productive as I can during my lifespan in some kind of profitable way, after living security has been pseudo-established. In terms of professional capacity. There are of course other aims, but living security is the most fundamental necessary layer.

You can have no internet, and while life is kind of boring, there's no anxiety or great depression. I find when there's no internet, you quickly find things to do to alleviate the boredom. In my case, that meant lots of driving getting things and keeping myself entertained with the novelty-seeking of window shopping.

You have little income? Oh, the anxiety and depression is definitely there.

You have no home (Of some sort)? Oh, the anxiety is definitely there. Such was the case with the HEB chick.

Home and income, the basic necessities of life.

Talking about sessiles, you're missing the role that bankers play in that. The fact I'm a PRODUCER and not A TAKER or A PETTY THIEF, makes me explicitly a NON-SESSILE. Do I look like I'm on food stamps or taking any kind of welfare?

I already had this epiphany when I driving home from nuke school, the purpose of life is to create. And, so, creating I did and creation I will still to do. I create what people want and what people will buy. It's how I've been doing so much better than I was in the navy. This year was piss poor in terms of power and security constraints relative to the tidal wave I endured this christmas, but that hopefully should not be a concern next year if my plans come to fruition and get line electricity.

I figure I can keep working in construction until the morning of mid-April. Mosquito free season ends the end of February.
 
Talking about producing, I cut the blockers and nailed them in.

Found the tape measure and magic square were essential. It seems like the chop saw really is necessary to get those perfectly square cuts, a rip saw, even with a speed square and pen, doesn't really seem to reliably produce two perfectly parallel end faces. It still works, just doesn't look perfect. I'm seeking perfect appearances.

I figured out how to use the speed square. It seems to be a way to get any degree cut you want, in addition to the fast and convenient 90 and 45 degree angles, which is convenient if you don't have a chop saw. Seems like it'd be handy for things like roof pitch.
 
Anyway, pretty sure I got some kind of blockage in the right carotid. I seem to reliably get right forehead pain in moments of acute stress, like yesterday. The idea of a stroke at this age is definitely not absurd, just kind of undesirable. Death in 50% of cases, significant cognitive disability in a high percentage of the other 50%. That would most likely impact any revenue producing streams I might have in some significant ways. But, hey, I might get social security disability? Those dollars would stretch here...

Then I could be called sessile. And, boy, in that case, did I choose the sessile life or did it choose me?

I like how greek tragedies and their myths tend to reflect reality, more so than the christian myths. I'd say the former were more realists, while the latter were more idealists.

And the greeks had this thing called the fates. And was it an ever present concept in Oedipus and it played a role in many a greek heros lives.

They also have a similar concept in Christianity, but no specific deities representing that specific concept. "God's plan and only god knows it."
 
swbluto said:
Anyway, pretty sure I got some kind of blockage in the right carotid. I seem to reliably get right forehead pain in moments of acute stress, like yesterday. The idea of a stroke at this age is definitely not absurd, just kind of undesirable. Death in 50% of cases, significant cognitive disability in a high percentage of the other 50%. That would most likely impact any revenue producing streams I might have in some significant ways. But, hey, I might get social security disability? Those dollars would stretch here...

Then I could be called sessile. And, boy, in that case, did I choose the sessile life or did it choose me?

In order to get SS disability you need to see at least a doctor. Is blockage removable or is it unable to be removed thru surgery? I know SSD is a lot more generous than it should be, so a person like you probably qualify. Or you might get Medicaid! Free medical and free money! It's there but YOU would have to show your face to qualify???
 
For someone your age who is not a doctor goes back to my assumption that you are a female as no MAN i have ever met sounds like the girl you do. Hope you can find your gender identity as you sure sound like a girl. You go girl? Really hope you find your way as i do not think that they have gender neutral bathrooms in texas. :shock:
 
DAND214 said:
swbluto said:
Anyway, pretty sure I got some kind of blockage in the right carotid. I seem to reliably get right forehead pain in moments of acute stress, like yesterday. The idea of a stroke at this age is definitely not absurd, just kind of undesirable. Death in 50% of cases, significant cognitive disability in a high percentage of the other 50%. That would most likely impact any revenue producing streams I might have in some significant ways. But, hey, I might get social security disability? Those dollars would stretch here...

Then I could be called sessile. And, boy, in that case, did I choose the sessile life or did it choose me?

In order to get SS disability you need to see at least a doctor. Is blockage removable or is it unable to be removed thru surgery? I know SSD is a lot more generous than it should be, so a person like you probably qualify. Or you might get Medicaid! Free medical and free money! It's there but YOU would have to show your face to qualify???

I don't, but there are surgeries for it assuming it's standard carotid artery stenosis.

Research shows the 5-10 year prognosis in young people is poor due to pre-existing extensive systemic arthersclerosis. The paper seemed to imply the heart was responsible in many of the poor cases, but it could be anything. So, kind of looks like one of those difficult-to-avoid fate kind of things.

I don't really know how advanced it is in my case, I don't have a realistic idea as far as progrnosis.
 
slacker said:
For someone your age who is not a doctor goes back to my assumption that you are a female as no MAN i have ever met sounds like the girl you do. Hope you can find your gender identity as you sure sound like a girl. You go girl? Really hope you find your way as i do not think that they have gender neutral bathrooms in texas. :shock:

Lol. Are you trying to insult me or you /really/ saying it like you see it? lol.

I've long had that suspicion, a girlish mentality, but it's not something I've dwelled on extensively.

It kind of makes me wonder if I'm attracted to sluts because I'm the love seeking girl, and sluts are the promiscuous sex-seeking men? It's very clear I initially was focused on "Does she really love me" and she was initially focused on "Come on baby, let's do it".

Usually men are the promiscuous sex seekers who apparently shun commitment (I GUESS... lol), girls seek love from that one guy who will commit.

In terms of commitment, I really wanted the HEB chick's commitment, though I'm aware I can't really expect that from a slut.

It /almost/ seemed like the heb chick was seeking sex, and I was seeking love. But, I would assume we both enjoyed both, so probably not a realistic dichotomy, lol.

People in real life don't mistake me for a girl, for obvious reasons. Although... my personality at times from what I can infer kind of seems like it. And my face looks a little pretty.
 
swbluto said:
People in real life don't mistake me for a girl, for obvious reasons. Although... my personality at times from what I can infer kind of seems like it. And my face looks a little pretty.

People often don't mistake GIRLS for girls. Because there's such as the African track star who failed the DNA test and had his records in female track and field thrown out. And you missed the opportunity to tell Slacker
swbluto should have wrote said:
I've decided to go ahead and be a girl, so we gotta get together.

From now on, YOU can be the H.E.B. chick.

swbluto said:
Talking about sessiles, you're missing the role that bankers play in that. The fact I'm a PRODUCER and not A TAKER or A PETTY THIEF, makes me explicitly a NON-SESSILE.

That has nothing to do with sessile. Ever hear of these women searching frantically for a man, any man, then there's this guy who seems successful enough, etc.? Oh darn, still in his 30's or whatever, still living with his mother, still not what they had in mind. I've had coworkers I've referred to as 'The Furniture.' Not going anywhere on their own, they'll be around until someone redecorates. One job I'd left the bosses came around 2 years later and asked if I'd like to be the designer. Only 3 were gone, the other 4 I'd supervise were still waiting to be replaced. I sent a friend to get the job and he redecorated in just a few months. They were all out of television once they were out of that job. Sessile means not going anywhere. I mentioned just because a barnacle is attached to a ship that doesn't mean IT is moving. Just as one of my brothers can make no claim to being a big shot just because his mother has this ranch land that he can walk around and act important on.

Meanwhile, mosquitoes may be blood suckers, but their not sessile, are they?

Blockage in your artery. You need to get a bit more active, no need to go overboard at first. You take like one aspirin 2-3 times a day. Read up on the diet thing, while your body is healthier for eating a certain amount of fat, if you went fat free for a time that helps it decide to scavenge what it can from places like your bloodstream. Read up on angioplasty, too. While I doubt you have the blockage, I'm pointing you in the direction of things that would do most people some good.
 
Okay, so, in other words... you're not advancing... you're just going with the motions.

Just happens that motion in my case has been UP UP UP!

So much for sessile, lol.

I can't tell if the economy is just frenetic this year (Definitely seems like it, I bought this property for $4000, now I'm seeing them advertised $7000 minimum literally one year later.) or I'm experiencing a legitimate industry upward trend. Might be a little of both.

Anyway, once I get the house built, I'll have a platform to make some significant changes.

I'm just a little constrained in this tiny RV with my bed as a desk. Definitely no room for additional equipment. Definitely no room for a shower, the only practical place for a shower being a legitimate mosquito and no-seeum exclusion zone.

I really need line electricity to get electricity costs down and get higher power levels. Exploratory costs are a lot higher with gasoline.

I had a little heart to heart with those guys, and they appreciated my honesty, and so they took me off the chopping block a little ahead of schedule.
 
Dauntless said:
Ever hear of these women searching frantically for a man, any man, then there's this guy who seems successful enough, etc.? Oh darn, still in his 30's or whatever, still living with his mother, still not what they had in mind.

Why do I get this feeling you're alluding to the HEB chick?

Anyway, really, remember... just as it is in business, it is with women.

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Oh, also learned that all the supports on the perimeter of the floor frame needs to be deck blocks. Otherwise, it likes to wobble. Maybe it's less of an issue on larger homes? Maybe it'll stop wobbling once I nail in the osb subfloor...
 
http://www.lovepanky.com/men/understanding-women/does-she-love-me-signs-of-love

So, you hang out with your buddies down at the pub, and the conversation moves on to the womenfolk in their lives. No doubt, they will all have something to complain about. If you can’t relate, it is because your lady is totally into you, and just wants to keep you happy.

Yep! It's funny how after I gazed in her eyes and made a deep neural connection with her, I had absolutely no complaints about her. She was lovely in nearly all respects, no moaning whatsoever. I'd always laud her, never denigrate her.

Maybe not initially, but definitely after the first week when all the positives came to the fore.
 
So is it just me, or can the hordes take advantage of ANOTHER opportunity to upbraid you over their noticing your incessant harping about proving yourself and-and-oh gawd spare me the whole thing about comparisons you make then deny? Why yes, I think they DO get to let you have it on that.

swbluto said:
And the greeks had this thing called the fates.

More to the point, they had Deus Ex Machina. But you don't. Get over it.

swbluto said:
Okay, so, in other words... you're not advancing... you're just going with the motions.

Just happens that motion in my case has been UP UP UP!

Barely high enough to go splat, but you managed.

swbluto said:
So much for sessile, lol.

I see you're finally getting my point. So are you finally ready for some movement, Ses?

swbluto said:
I really need line electricity to get electricity costs down and get higher power levels. Exploratory costs are a lot higher with gasoline.

What do you need electricity for if you're out of business?

swbluto said:
I had a little heart to heart with those guys, and they appreciated my honesty, and so they took me off the chopping block a little ahead of schedule.

What guys did you get romantic with now? For once, ignore Dan, we don't want certain pictures.

swbluto said:
Why do I get this feeling you're alluding to the HEB chick?

Um, because it's ALWAYS the H.E.B. chick with you? You sure never move from there.

swbluto said:
Yep! It's funny how after I gazed in her eyezzzzzzzzzzzzz. . . had absolutely no complaintzzzzzzzzzzhe was lovely in nearly all respectzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. . . I'd alwayzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. . . never denigraaaaaaaaa. . .zzzzzzzzzzzzzz. . . .

. . . .Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz(SNORK!) Oh, no, never denigrate her, just call her a slut and all. Trying to sleep with a guy so she could spend the night. Yeah, all the things her mother hoped you'd say about her.
 
Sleeping over at a guy's place looks really common judging from google results.

So those lyrics I hear along the lines of "Will you be there in the morning?" and "As soon as the sun comes up, I cut 'em all loose and works my excuse" are happening at the guy's place.

I see. And is my stance that having an acceptable dwelling is necessary but insufficient not unlikely true?

Seems like that's what many girls were hoping to do now that I think about it, just not as nearly as consummated as was with the HEB chick. Come over and stay the night. I typically segued away from the topic for obvious reasons.

It's not merely a matter of being sexy. It's also having that subliminal sexual aggression/desire that turns (some,many) women on. I would estimate that's actually primarily it.

Gee, sessile. Obviously you don't know some of the people I know. Right now the movement is establishing temp residence then permanent residence at a hand-picked location, vs, whatever crap is on the market. Once I get line electricity, I will be enabled to expand. I can do some forms of expansion once I get the temp cabin built.

That one older gal I told seemed charmed about my building a cabin.

Right now, I'm just catching up with work. Excessive this year and power levels are constrained.
 
Dauntless said:
. . . .Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz(SNORK!) Oh, no, never denigrate her, just call her a slut and all. Trying to sleep with a guy so she could spend the night. Yeah, all the things her mother hoped you'd say about her.

Hey, you don't know her circumstances. Her mom could've kicked her out, and what would she have cared? If she was a legitimate slut, there's a chance she got disowned by the family. That's what happened to the kroger girl, and she definitely acted depressed.

In terms of the use of terms, I use it almost exclusively as a good description of her behavior, not as an insult. There's a difference. Note I didn't start calling her a slut until the dictionary called "overt sexual behavior" girls as sluts, so it's just what the dictionary has labeled her. I don't think of sluts poorly, generally speaking, but they are potentially undesireable in the sense they fail expectations. Granted, if you don't have such expectations, not a problem. If I understood she was a slut, I'd bang her anyway, but it would be incredibly hard to get over the love I had for her.

That affectionate heart of gold. Sometimes I wonder if it's just pretend... like, could she be just as cold as my mother is? And she's just pretending? Or is it really how she is? It's so lovable, that's why I wonder. Doesn't seem like that many people are like that... hardly anyone, really.

I suspect maybe it declines with age.
 
Um, because it's ALWAYS the H.E.B. chick with you? You sure never move from there.

Oh, you might be right. In this case, I'll accept the word sessile, lol.

But she legitimately seemed to be looking for "any guy". Well, any guy with a job.

She was visibly refraining from her "cocktease performance" until she inferred I had a job. Granted, her inference was probably off the mark (She assumed I was a logger, more than likely), but it hinged on that inference, no doubt.

That's why part of me suspects she was a prostitute, but it just doesn't seem like you'd normally come across one as an HEB cashier. So I think she was more of the commonplace "girl looking for a guy with a place and a job" like the girl in my dream told me. I probably ticked off the "has a place" box with another one of her inferences when I said I came her for gardening opportunities.
 
When gazes meet... when you come across your love...

No guy should be without this life experience, I swear.

You don't know life until you've experienced it.

There are certain things that are exciting, and some are aro using, but nothing nearly quite as fulfilling as finding your true raison d'etre and fulfilling it.

Granted, it's questionable whether it was actually a good move to make on my part. Might've chained me to someone who's going to be gone forever. Might've inadvertently f'ed myself over.

It's a move that seems typically done by players, but often the girls curse at the guy who's done as he hits it and quits it and he's stolen her heart and trampled it. When done by a non-player, like myself, it's like true love as you're not trying to trample anyone's heart. Granted, it appears I've had lot of opportunity to be a player, girls throwing themselves at me. Seems they always want to come to my place, which kills the deal.
 
As I exited, we looked at each other, both incredibly happy that we found each other.

I look back, when she was yelling her exclamations of joy, I just realized... she wasn't normally doing that. Talking that loudly and yelling over the hubbub. So, she must've been incredibly motivated to do something like that. She actually seemed to be a somewhat demure girl at first.
 
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