salty9
1 kW
Interesting church http://www.venganza.org/
Any Other Pastafarians Here?
- Thread starter salty9
- Start date
MattyCiii
100 kW
Long live the Flying Spaghetti Monster!
dnmun
1 PW
never heard of them before but now am saved. touched by his noodleness.
i am gonna become an ordained minister and convert my home to a sanctuary for all Pastafarians and a convent for strippers in need of companionship.
i am praying for their blessings soon.
free charging for all Pastafarians, beer is extra.
RAmen.
i am gonna become an ordained minister and convert my home to a sanctuary for all Pastafarians and a convent for strippers in need of companionship.
i am praying for their blessings soon.
free charging for all Pastafarians, beer is extra.
RAmen.
Kingfish
100 MW
:lol: I was just talking about that on another thread:dnmun said:
Converts are everywhere!KF yesterday said:
To his (or her) Noodlenessness, KF
dnmun
1 PW
this is really a high class religion though.
they use a gold seal on the certificate that confirms your ordination as a minister to perform marriages.
they didn't put any gold seal on my masters degree, so now i feel cheated. but they didn't charge me $20 either.
they use a gold seal on the certificate that confirms your ordination as a minister to perform marriages.
they didn't put any gold seal on my masters degree, so now i feel cheated. but they didn't charge me $20 either.
fizzit
10 kW
I have the emblem of His Noodliness on the back of my CRX:
I live across the street from a baptist church and frequently there are SUVs with jesus bumper stickers parked in front of and behind my little car
I live across the street from a baptist church and frequently there are SUVs with jesus bumper stickers parked in front of and behind my little car
dnmun
1 PW
it would be so neat if they made a pirate fish with it's mouth wide open, a see through decal type that you could stick onto the rear of those guys with the fish symbol.
mouth open about to swallow the icthys emblem. distribute them for $.50 each and let people apply them in parking lots and wherever the opportunity arises.
mouth open about to swallow the icthys emblem. distribute them for $.50 each and let people apply them in parking lots and wherever the opportunity arises.
Kingfish
100 MW
I thought they have one for Darwin eatin' a fish...dnmun said:
Oh, here you go: Car Emblems. Lot's of good ones.
This one appeals to my empty stomach.
~KF
MikeFairbanks
100 kW
I consider myself to be a rarity in this world: A Christian who actually admires the lifestyle of Christ.
Here's a dude who wasn't interested in hanging out with a bunch of Torah Thumpers and who would help anyone. He enjoyed drinking wine with friends, helping the poor, comforting and healing the sick, and being kind to everyone who wasn't a jerk.
But a pastafarian I can't be. That stuff is too fattening.
Here's a dude who wasn't interested in hanging out with a bunch of Torah Thumpers and who would help anyone. He enjoyed drinking wine with friends, helping the poor, comforting and healing the sick, and being kind to everyone who wasn't a jerk.
But a pastafarian I can't be. That stuff is too fattening.
dnmun
1 PW
but the point is you don't know that.
you only have FAITH in what the bible thumpers have told you for the last 300 years since king james forced his scribes to post up some stuff to call a bible which would be called the true word of god by rule of of a king. nothing more.
the divine inspiration and informed consideration of the FSM as a divinity is equally valid.
that is the point.
when the bible thumpers are able to force children to be indoctrinated into their religious beliefs then it is a violation of the US constitution.
you only have FAITH in what the bible thumpers have told you for the last 300 years since king james forced his scribes to post up some stuff to call a bible which would be called the true word of god by rule of of a king. nothing more.
the divine inspiration and informed consideration of the FSM as a divinity is equally valid.
that is the point.
when the bible thumpers are able to force children to be indoctrinated into their religious beliefs then it is a violation of the US constitution.
Chalo
100 TW
Beer volcano, stripper factory. What's not to like?
salty9
1 kW
8)
Then you might like Kristofferson's "Jesus Was a Capricorn" (As I am but it is a coincidence as my holey thoughts never involved religion)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCdfYkUPvTs&list=PLC268F788EBD8EAD0
neptronix said:
Then you might like Kristofferson's "Jesus Was a Capricorn" (As I am but it is a coincidence as my holey thoughts never involved religion)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCdfYkUPvTs&list=PLC268F788EBD8EAD0
Dauntless
100 TW
We have a coffee church just a half mile from me. That is, they run a coffee shop as a headquarters all week, then share a church building with various denominations which sublet the location over the weekend. Those I've talked to say the coffee is indeed promenient in the practice of the faith. This has provided me with much material over the last few years; 'Instead of first communion, they have FIRST KAHLUA!' (BA DUMP BUMP!) For all that, I'd never bothered to even do a little Google search to see if this was a unique organization. Until now.
Apparently, there are those for whom the bean has come to the forefront of the practice of faith. I'm not just talking about there being coffee PRESENT at normal church functions, I mean REALLY, I found a few churches with the coffee bar INSIDE. Did you ever watch the TV series 'GCB' with the couple offering the biblical diet food? All my graphics are coming from sites on the coffee based practice of faith. So does the Spaghetti Church drink any Java? These could be compatible faith based organizations.
So my friend had to go to marriage counseling at the coffee church, because his crazy wife had started going there. Actually, it was at their coffee shop. And he wound up with a cup in front of him. From what he said, the counseling went really well, they REALLY wanted to talk to him about the difficulties of living with a spouse with psychological problems and asking him to help get her to go to their own FREE therapist, which she'd been resisting going to. (To be fair I had to include that detail.) Oh, he said he was surprised to learn the coffee there was GREAT.
So I'm not much for churchgoing myself. Or drinking coffee. My mother was a little too much into both. As far as I'm concerned I grew up a victim of real life religious persecution while attending Catholic school. (Which had a lot of spaghetti dinners. Hmmmm.)
Then I found this on a website for a church for coffee based faith:
I think I've found the spiritual leader I've been looking for. Except, well, coffee actually makes me sick. Just the smell of it in a room where everyone is drinking it can be too much. But maybe if I could discover a real pasta church which embraced that same philosophy: We have a Spaghetti Factory Restaurant just a few blocks from the coffee church. . . .
Dauntless
100 TW
neptronix said:
Yeah, that's the way those atheists lure you in. Keep their real intentions under the surface, apply a little peer pressure. Bet they even have some cute chicks/waitresses doing some flirty fishing. Meeting at a coffee shop that does NOT serve spaghetti, I presume. . . .
Do you know what David Berg, the creator of Flirty Fishing, told his female followers they were to be? (Hint: That's an actual cover of a training manual.)
Kingfish
100 MW
Harsh. Why can't people love each other without the stigma? I'm not religious in the biblical sense, yet I honor friendship and community. I’d like to believe each of us has a story inside that is worthy. Can we focus on the positive and build a fellowship of understanding, of faith, of solution, of freedom, of acceptance? Seems pretty easy to me: Just have to give up on the “hate” part and all should fall into place…Dauntless said:neptronix said:
Yeah, that's the way those atheists lure you in. Keep their real intentions under the surface, apply a little peer pressure. Bet they even have some cute chicks/waitresses doing some flirty fishing. Meeting at a coffee shop that does NOT serve spaghetti, I presume. . . .
Do you know what David Berg, the creator of Flirty Fishing, told his female followers they were to be? (Hint: That's an actual cover of a training manual.)
So many great ideas here; I truly enjoy the ES fellowship and expression.
…just sayin… KF
dnmun
1 PW
hey, is that girl doing jesus from the top. that's not missionary.
Dauntless
100 TW
(Mentioning Flirty Fishing at the coffee shop was supposed to be a little joke, but since there was a question. . . .)
Oh darn, YOU I would have expected to be familiar with David Berg and the Church of God, etc. The fact is, while they made it famous, all the while producing comics for little girls to grow up reading as indoctrination that are downright SHOCKING (No, this is NOT something someone else produced to mock them, this is THEIR OWN) so many others learned from it. Flirty Fishing goes on all the time, to this day.
So I went over to a friends house a few years back, the 18 year old of the house was getting ready to go to a dance. Not at school, at 'The Rock.' (No, NOT Dwayne Johnson's house.) So I decided to tip him off about Flirty Fishing, as he'd been invited by this girl, yada yada yada. This led to me telling him my own tale of being fished in such a manner:
My senior year of college I was at the Brea Mall where I noticed this damn good looking college age girl following me around. Think Keira Knightly. I might think it a bit suspicious that such a woman notices me, right? Moreso that she seems to be absolutely glowing when I make eye contact with her. See, when you're 13 you have these fantasies that it'll be just like this, by the time you're 21 you know better.
Then again, you don't. I mean, I sure WANTED to believe, right? So I wind up heading to her house to pick her up for a date. It occurs to me this is the neighborhood of a friends girlfriend from 2 1/2 years ago. Wait a minute, this is the HOUSE of his girlfriend. (Only went there once.) Sure enough, guess who answers the door. Not that the friends' old girlfriend was half bad, but the younger sister, geez. . . .
So the older sister Vicki had been one hell of a tease, but still a well behaved Catholic girl. She had a trick of luring my friend to the house in the afternoon for a little ALONE time, but danged if the younger/then high school sister didn't keep coming home from school before there was time for, well, you know. I made the point to him that's why she had him come over at the time he did, just before high school got out. So I'm wondering how this is really going to go with Lisa. Well, let's just say she wasn't so well behaved. I don't been anything extreme, but getting in the car on the first date and she's already getting, well. . . . And wildly excited about even mentioning it.
After this experience, of course, I've learned that, automatically, something bad is in the offing. A girl like that, to an unexciting total stranger, coming on strong. I have a tough time just getting a date to be civil toward me, why would one that looked like this be going out of her way. . . ?
It didn't take long for me to find out. She wanted me to go to her little church, one I hadn't realized at that time was a cult. Vicki was going to eventually tell me that while Lisa had been going with the family to the Catholic Church, she'd also been sneaking off to the cult church. Until she was 18, when she announced what her REAL faith was. Now she was trying to lure me in.
It was after that didn't work and Lisa was then no longer talking to me that I got the chance to talk to Vickie about it all. Of course she was telling me her mom was going to be real disappointed, with the cult (Just 2 blocks from their house) she had some real loser guys hanging around acting like they ran the household. Ma was hoping I was a sign that things would be getting better. I left certain details out of what I told Vickie. I guess it was a little over a year later, I was working in a convenience store, the Mom parked the car right where I could see in it. Lisa was in hte passenger seat, refusing to come in when she saw me. The Mother was just talking and talking to me at the register, wanting me to go out and say hello to her, but I made the point if she wanted to talk to me she'd have come in.
I guess she wasn't long for the cult. Maybe a year after that I was shooting one of these bikini contest events a manufacturer was staging, so guess who one of the contestants was. Couldn't help but wonder if the cult had got her started with modeling to bring them even more money. But she made the point she'd walked away from it, ignored them as they came to the door again and again, etc. Her all around attitude was now more in line with how I expect a woman like that to behave toward me. As in she was trying to make sure I realized we weren't getting back together. Proof enough to me she'd been deprogrammed. (Sigh.)
So the boy I told this story to went to the dance anyway, but he did listen to the cues I warned him about: Either being approached with personal attention from some "Leader" that already knows his name or an announcement to the group he's there, talk of the things he's going to be doing there as though it's already decided he's coming, most important that any display of reluctance on his part will have the girl hinting at the OTHER thing he'll be missing if he doesn't come.
So he was back home before long at all. Turns out the dances start off with a church service, the leader of which calls the names of all the victims to be introduced to everyone. He found out he was already on a "List" for some future activities. And of course the girl had that 'If you don't come, you won't come' attitude. (That's as graphic as I'm willing to get, okay?) The fact that I'd been able to warn him it would happen was all it took to convince him just what a trap it was, so he left. Good job all around.
So maybe his bunch doesn't engage in the worst practices of Flirty Fishing. (aka "FFing.") She might have merely been expected to deliver a body count and then her job was done. And maybe Lisa was only expected to be more like her sister Vickie, God's Tease instead of God's Whore. Her Mother wouldn't have really been shocked at anything that happened between us, though I'm sure she'd have been disturbed that it came about so quickly. I also wonder if at 18-19 maybe Lisa was having trouble this first time fulfilling the role they'd thrust her into. If I'd gone to the church she might have felt obligated. Thinking of that makes me really glad I didn't go, I've always tried to be the good guy.
Sad thing being that, unlike Lisa, most of these girls are trapped into this by parents who fall for these cultie chuches and the daughters are then raised into this. If you want to be shocked and angered, read the comics Alan Berg's church put in the hands of grade school age girls, (Even depicting "Hookers for Jesus," their own term, suffering for the good of the church) the activities they were to engage in with the adult members to ready themselves for when they went fishing for "Recruits and for resources." (The Church needs the money, right? They did indeed do it for "Contributions.") Read actress Rose McGowan's account of being groomed by the church while growing up, until her father couldn't stand it and the family escaped, with the church hot on their heels and trying to break their door down where they were hiding. . . .
And THAT is why there will always be a stigma. Why you should always beware someone with a bible and a message, as they have such entitlement issues when it comes to preaching. Beware ANY faith based teaching. But a spaghetti church, yeah, that could work for me. With a gut like mine, I'm sure I could readily embrace food based faith. Also, if you could find me one that utilized auto racing. . . .
By the way, because the Pastafarians are a bunch of post modernists, this whole joke includes some role playing gags at flirty fishing, though of course it looks harmless. I think. . . .
Kingfish said:
Oh darn, YOU I would have expected to be familiar with David Berg and the Church of God, etc. The fact is, while they made it famous, all the while producing comics for little girls to grow up reading as indoctrination that are downright SHOCKING (No, this is NOT something someone else produced to mock them, this is THEIR OWN) so many others learned from it. Flirty Fishing goes on all the time, to this day.
So I went over to a friends house a few years back, the 18 year old of the house was getting ready to go to a dance. Not at school, at 'The Rock.' (No, NOT Dwayne Johnson's house.) So I decided to tip him off about Flirty Fishing, as he'd been invited by this girl, yada yada yada. This led to me telling him my own tale of being fished in such a manner:
My senior year of college I was at the Brea Mall where I noticed this damn good looking college age girl following me around. Think Keira Knightly. I might think it a bit suspicious that such a woman notices me, right? Moreso that she seems to be absolutely glowing when I make eye contact with her. See, when you're 13 you have these fantasies that it'll be just like this, by the time you're 21 you know better.
Then again, you don't. I mean, I sure WANTED to believe, right? So I wind up heading to her house to pick her up for a date. It occurs to me this is the neighborhood of a friends girlfriend from 2 1/2 years ago. Wait a minute, this is the HOUSE of his girlfriend. (Only went there once.) Sure enough, guess who answers the door. Not that the friends' old girlfriend was half bad, but the younger sister, geez. . . .
So the older sister Vicki had been one hell of a tease, but still a well behaved Catholic girl. She had a trick of luring my friend to the house in the afternoon for a little ALONE time, but danged if the younger/then high school sister didn't keep coming home from school before there was time for, well, you know. I made the point to him that's why she had him come over at the time he did, just before high school got out. So I'm wondering how this is really going to go with Lisa. Well, let's just say she wasn't so well behaved. I don't been anything extreme, but getting in the car on the first date and she's already getting, well. . . . And wildly excited about even mentioning it.
After this experience, of course, I've learned that, automatically, something bad is in the offing. A girl like that, to an unexciting total stranger, coming on strong. I have a tough time just getting a date to be civil toward me, why would one that looked like this be going out of her way. . . ?
It didn't take long for me to find out. She wanted me to go to her little church, one I hadn't realized at that time was a cult. Vicki was going to eventually tell me that while Lisa had been going with the family to the Catholic Church, she'd also been sneaking off to the cult church. Until she was 18, when she announced what her REAL faith was. Now she was trying to lure me in.
It was after that didn't work and Lisa was then no longer talking to me that I got the chance to talk to Vickie about it all. Of course she was telling me her mom was going to be real disappointed, with the cult (Just 2 blocks from their house) she had some real loser guys hanging around acting like they ran the household. Ma was hoping I was a sign that things would be getting better. I left certain details out of what I told Vickie. I guess it was a little over a year later, I was working in a convenience store, the Mom parked the car right where I could see in it. Lisa was in hte passenger seat, refusing to come in when she saw me. The Mother was just talking and talking to me at the register, wanting me to go out and say hello to her, but I made the point if she wanted to talk to me she'd have come in.
I guess she wasn't long for the cult. Maybe a year after that I was shooting one of these bikini contest events a manufacturer was staging, so guess who one of the contestants was. Couldn't help but wonder if the cult had got her started with modeling to bring them even more money. But she made the point she'd walked away from it, ignored them as they came to the door again and again, etc. Her all around attitude was now more in line with how I expect a woman like that to behave toward me. As in she was trying to make sure I realized we weren't getting back together. Proof enough to me she'd been deprogrammed. (Sigh.)
So the boy I told this story to went to the dance anyway, but he did listen to the cues I warned him about: Either being approached with personal attention from some "Leader" that already knows his name or an announcement to the group he's there, talk of the things he's going to be doing there as though it's already decided he's coming, most important that any display of reluctance on his part will have the girl hinting at the OTHER thing he'll be missing if he doesn't come.
So he was back home before long at all. Turns out the dances start off with a church service, the leader of which calls the names of all the victims to be introduced to everyone. He found out he was already on a "List" for some future activities. And of course the girl had that 'If you don't come, you won't come' attitude. (That's as graphic as I'm willing to get, okay?) The fact that I'd been able to warn him it would happen was all it took to convince him just what a trap it was, so he left. Good job all around.
So maybe his bunch doesn't engage in the worst practices of Flirty Fishing. (aka "FFing.") She might have merely been expected to deliver a body count and then her job was done. And maybe Lisa was only expected to be more like her sister Vickie, God's Tease instead of God's Whore. Her Mother wouldn't have really been shocked at anything that happened between us, though I'm sure she'd have been disturbed that it came about so quickly. I also wonder if at 18-19 maybe Lisa was having trouble this first time fulfilling the role they'd thrust her into. If I'd gone to the church she might have felt obligated. Thinking of that makes me really glad I didn't go, I've always tried to be the good guy.
Sad thing being that, unlike Lisa, most of these girls are trapped into this by parents who fall for these cultie chuches and the daughters are then raised into this. If you want to be shocked and angered, read the comics Alan Berg's church put in the hands of grade school age girls, (Even depicting "Hookers for Jesus," their own term, suffering for the good of the church) the activities they were to engage in with the adult members to ready themselves for when they went fishing for "Recruits and for resources." (The Church needs the money, right? They did indeed do it for "Contributions.") Read actress Rose McGowan's account of being groomed by the church while growing up, until her father couldn't stand it and the family escaped, with the church hot on their heels and trying to break their door down where they were hiding. . . .
And THAT is why there will always be a stigma. Why you should always beware someone with a bible and a message, as they have such entitlement issues when it comes to preaching. Beware ANY faith based teaching. But a spaghetti church, yeah, that could work for me. With a gut like mine, I'm sure I could readily embrace food based faith. Also, if you could find me one that utilized auto racing. . . .
By the way, because the Pastafarians are a bunch of post modernists, this whole joke includes some role playing gags at flirty fishing, though of course it looks harmless. I think. . . .
Kingfish
100 MW
I must admit that about once a decade (ok, twice in my twenties… I think) that I get hoodwinked by the comely wink and am shanghaied into a religious circle. I have seen the lot, from Devil Worship to Scientology, to hallucinating Christians in the Navy. The only exception was Campus Life in High School: There I was driven by the mindless pointy beastie trying to get closer to the one I wanted to woo… oh man was that a forlorn pursuit. 
The last time was about six years ago on a Friday night at this café that served really great beer on tap – and they’re doing karaoke. This cute girl wanted to dance, next thing I knew they had me up there singing. Back in the booth she’s whispering to me that she wants to hook up, not tonight – but tomorrow morning: She’s going to come by early and “take me someplace” where we can have fun. Sure enough next morning she’s at the door and as I get in the car – there’s another guy!?! What the…??? “Oh this is so and so, and heeeee’s my friend” all smiles and I’m a bit hung over not yet catching on thinking this is weird and probably leading to oddly kinky… when no sooner than we pull up to the Synagogue!!! Now I’m sitting on the bench with heads hung low. :x The rabbi is taking to the congregation, handing out bottled water – which I desperately need, and I start to look around at all the hung over guys whilst the rabbi is bleating on about “all you have to do is ba-lieve, Ba-LIEVE in the Laurd”… yeah buddy, I believe I won’t do this again. Where’s the door?
Now that… was cruel.
For years I’ve been telling bible thumpers that I believe in the Purple People Eater, and that he should eat purple people, especially one’s with pink spots. Make no laws; he can eat as many as he wants. Jehovah Witness are particularly vulnerable to educated replies, and I can’t begin to count the years where I had one stooge on the hook coming back for more… trying to convince me of one thing or another. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that every time he took out the standard-issue pamphlet I had Jimi Hendrix’s version of “All along the Watchtower” play through my head, creating a humorous twinkle in mine eyes.
[youtube]4AuxJH2Mj30[/youtube]
Yeah, don’t miss those guys. But you can sort of see how they could have influenced the writing in “The Matrix”, yessss Mr. Anderson?
[youtube]4D7cPH7DHgA[/youtube]
Eatin' purple people, KF
The last time was about six years ago on a Friday night at this café that served really great beer on tap – and they’re doing karaoke. This cute girl wanted to dance, next thing I knew they had me up there singing. Back in the booth she’s whispering to me that she wants to hook up, not tonight – but tomorrow morning: She’s going to come by early and “take me someplace” where we can have fun.
Sure enough next morning she’s at the door and as I get in the car – there’s another guy!?! What the…??? “Oh this is so and so, and heeeee’s my friend” all smiles and I’m a bit hung over not yet catching on thinking this is weird and probably leading to oddly kinky… when no sooner than we pull up to the Synagogue!!! Now I’m sitting on the bench with heads hung low. :x The rabbi is taking to the congregation, handing out bottled water – which I desperately need, and I start to look around at all the hung over guys whilst the rabbi is bleating on about “all you have to do is ba-lieve, Ba-LIEVE in the Laurd”… yeah buddy, I believe I won’t do this again. Where’s the door? Now that… was cruel.
For years I’ve been telling bible thumpers that I believe in the Purple People Eater, and that he should eat purple people, especially one’s with pink spots. Make no laws; he can eat as many as he wants. Jehovah Witness are particularly vulnerable to educated replies, and I can’t begin to count the years where I had one stooge on the hook coming back for more… trying to convince me of one thing or another. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that every time he took out the standard-issue pamphlet I had Jimi Hendrix’s version of “All along the Watchtower” play through my head, creating a humorous twinkle in mine eyes.
[youtube]4AuxJH2Mj30[/youtube]
Yeah, don’t miss those guys. But you can sort of see how they could have influenced the writing in “The Matrix”, yessss Mr. Anderson?
[youtube]4D7cPH7DHgA[/youtube]
Eatin' purple people, KF
MikeFairbanks
100 kW
The Matrix was pretty well-designed, but I agree with the younger engineer when he said the machines kind of gave up on food somewhere along the line and just made everything tasted like chicken.
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