Buying forest land, implementing solar
- Thread starter swbluto
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My impression is that modern lyrics are noticeably more complex than 60s lyrics. Some of the female lyricists almost seem like modern Shakespearean poets in comparison, lol.
Maybe that's because modern musicians have been more empowered by IQ selection effects that's pervasive in the school setting as compared to the 60s. I wouldn't doubt selena gomez has a fairly high IQ. Self-fulfilling prophecy affect and all that.
Maybe that's because modern musicians have been more empowered by IQ selection effects that's pervasive in the school setting as compared to the 60s. I wouldn't doubt selena gomez has a fairly high IQ. Self-fulfilling prophecy affect and all that.
You know... I've noticed how there seems to be desireable properties right, but only a few of them are developed. That's strange considering I would think they'd be preferred to some extent over others in the neighborhood.
I believe it's because properties tend to get developed as they get sold, and they effectively get sold at random, so it appears properties get developed at random, at least in these parts where I'm guessing there's lower overall developmental demand as compared to inner houston and certain parts of houston (Like areas close to the woodlands).
So, I think mailings are definitely an effective approach to "choosing properties" you want instead of waiting for properties to come onto the market. If I were to wait for a waterfront property to become available, with the 20 that are available, I'd probably be waiting at least a year or two, and I'd just hope I'd be the first to snatch it. If I mail all of them, there's a much better chance of acquiring one in a more timely manner.
I guess it's like girls. Except, I'm not sure how to make the analogy make sense, lol.
Btw, it's 22F outside and it's getting down to 16F this night, so that's why I'm sitting on my ass in my semi-heated RV all day, lol.
I believe it's because properties tend to get developed as they get sold, and they effectively get sold at random, so it appears properties get developed at random, at least in these parts where I'm guessing there's lower overall developmental demand as compared to inner houston and certain parts of houston (Like areas close to the woodlands).
So, I think mailings are definitely an effective approach to "choosing properties" you want instead of waiting for properties to come onto the market. If I were to wait for a waterfront property to become available, with the 20 that are available, I'd probably be waiting at least a year or two, and I'd just hope I'd be the first to snatch it. If I mail all of them, there's a much better chance of acquiring one in a more timely manner.
I guess it's like girls. Except, I'm not sure how to make the analogy make sense, lol.
Btw, it's 22F outside and it's getting down to 16F this night, so that's why I'm sitting on my ass in my semi-heated RV all day, lol.
http://sibg.com/seduction-101/#when-8220picking-up-women8221-is-not-your-thing
And he doesn't think that technique works nowadays? Forcefulness worked wonders on the HEB chick. Everytime I've been verbally forceful with a women, I seem to get come-ons.
I guess you could consider this a form of dominance. The caveman doesn't ask nicely... he wields that club and forces that chien into submission.
Of course, it's not like he's doing it ALL THE TIME. Pretty much when she needs it...
Like when she starts thinking a little too highly of herself, starts getting uppity, disrespectful, yells at you, calls you names,etc.
She yelled at me (i.e., thinking too highly of herself), I yelled back, and I aggressively stared her down, and she fell in love. Or she got really wet. Probably both.
And he doesn't think that technique works nowadays? Forcefulness worked wonders on the HEB chick. Everytime I've been verbally forceful with a women, I seem to get come-ons.
I guess you could consider this a form of dominance. The caveman doesn't ask nicely... he wields that club and forces that chien into submission.
Of course, it's not like he's doing it ALL THE TIME. Pretty much when she needs it...
Like when she starts thinking a little too highly of herself, starts getting uppity, disrespectful, yells at you, calls you names,etc.
She yelled at me (i.e., thinking too highly of herself), I yelled back, and I aggressively stared her down, and she fell in love. Or she got really wet. Probably both.
I wonder if there's a male equivalent to the bible passage lady...
Bold, confident, rebellious and boisterous (Loud and energetic). Flatters with his lips. Encouragements and entices her (Tempts her), through touch and getting close (for a kiss, for example) but not completing it.
It almost seems like there is, but I can't really think of the stereotype right off hand...
It does seem like confidence and energy does seem to attract girls. Ambition in particular. I guess that's what girls don't /really/ need for attraction, ambition.
Ambition does really seem to spread those legs. It's literally happened on more than one occasion.
It was weird, feeling like I really needed to touch the HEB chick's hair, like pulling it a little. It's weird in the sense I've never had that kind of compulsion. Like the nuzzle compulsion, never had that one either. Had a lot of novel compulsions with that gal.
Bold, confident, rebellious and boisterous (Loud and energetic). Flatters with his lips. Encouragements and entices her (Tempts her), through touch and getting close (for a kiss, for example) but not completing it.
It almost seems like there is, but I can't really think of the stereotype right off hand...
It does seem like confidence and energy does seem to attract girls. Ambition in particular. I guess that's what girls don't /really/ need for attraction, ambition.
Ambition does really seem to spread those legs. It's literally happened on more than one occasion.
It was weird, feeling like I really needed to touch the HEB chick's hair, like pulling it a little. It's weird in the sense I've never had that kind of compulsion. Like the nuzzle compulsion, never had that one either. Had a lot of novel compulsions with that gal.
http://www.beyondtalk.net/fractionation/
Dang, I had that at 5 minutes. :lol:
(Granted, I think she was purposely looking to leave with someone... seeking immediate residence.)
Emotional rollercoaster. Yep, that's what was happening! She was definitely on an emotional rollercoaster, from one extreme to another in literally seconds.
Nope, doesn't matter. Behavior, behavior is number one.
However, doesn't hurt. Might help if it makes you feel better about yourself.
Amen on the hypnosis. It snagged the flock of seagulls guy, and it snagged the heb chick. It was interesting seeing her confidence completely vanish in literally seconds. Except my hypnosis was the "fall in love" kind... I think maybe they're not talking about that kind...
True. The more out of your league they are, the better the results when you don't act like it. Why? Because everybody else is, making it easy pickings.
It's funny how quickly the HEB chick turned from an 'out of league' girl to just-another-girl.
It seems even funnier when I say that when it seems like she considered herself a loser or something.
So it's all relative, I guess. All an illusion.
Dang, I had that at 5 minutes. :lol:
(Granted, I think she was purposely looking to leave with someone... seeking immediate residence.)
Emotional rollercoaster. Yep, that's what was happening! She was definitely on an emotional rollercoaster, from one extreme to another in literally seconds.
Nope, doesn't matter. Behavior, behavior is number one.
However, doesn't hurt. Might help if it makes you feel better about yourself.
Amen on the hypnosis. It snagged the flock of seagulls guy, and it snagged the heb chick. It was interesting seeing her confidence completely vanish in literally seconds. Except my hypnosis was the "fall in love" kind... I think maybe they're not talking about that kind...
True. The more out of your league they are, the better the results when you don't act like it. Why? Because everybody else is, making it easy pickings.
It's funny how quickly the HEB chick turned from an 'out of league' girl to just-another-girl.
It seems even funnier when I say that when it seems like she considered herself a loser or something.
So it's all relative, I guess. All an illusion.
Dauntless
100 TW
swbluto said:
A hurricane showed similar behavior? You're really off the deep end in general today.
swbluto said:
But you did have "Social Imagination," eh? You didn't have anything at 5 minutes, remember?
swbluto said:
No. All a DELUSION! Maybe even a hallucination. Maybe there wasn't even a woman in the H.E.B. while you were dreaming this up.
Did it ever occur to you that maybe you're still in the military? Maybe still in stockade, fantasizing what you'd be doing if you could get out? Maybe you managed to sneak in your celphone before they put you in the straitjacket? (It would explain how you're posting this.)
speaking of dreams...
just had one.
oh yes, on the way out of the library (Which was being treated as a social club, lots of cliques), a girl called me a raccoon.
Moi? A raccoon?
Because I had rings around my eyes?
Because I'm sneaky and a thief?
Her allegations must be baseless. It's as dauntless says, dreams are meaningless randomness.
Oh well, it's true... I was sneaking around the library and stealing girls' hearts. :wink: lol (Just kidding about the latter, though that's what I was trying to do... finding hearts to steal.)
It's funny about your last image, because I did have some errily similar kind of control over a girl once.
just had one.
oh yes, on the way out of the library (Which was being treated as a social club, lots of cliques), a girl called me a raccoon.
Moi? A raccoon?
Because I had rings around my eyes?
Because I'm sneaky and a thief?
Her allegations must be baseless. It's as dauntless says, dreams are meaningless randomness.
Oh well, it's true... I was sneaking around the library and stealing girls' hearts. :wink: lol (Just kidding about the latter, though that's what I was trying to do... finding hearts to steal.)
It's funny about your last image, because I did have some errily similar kind of control over a girl once.
Dauntless said:
Not true. Had her vocalizations, nonverbals, sexual encouragements and lots of arousal. And love, just didn't know what it was at the time. Hell, the girl going "Come come on let's do it!!" is a lot more arousing some girl pecking you. Those excited little girl vocalizations, oh... a kind of arousal I've never experienced before.
Oh, and she was my girlfriend. She and I both showed classic signs of this (Uncontrollable excitement and happiness, though I can't tell if it's because of that or because we fell in love. I suspect it's because we fell in love, because imagining myself girlfriending with some random girl without having fallen in love and gazing into her eyes... not quite the same amount of excitement and happiness.I would feel calm and proud, but not necessarily really happy and excited.):
I think she was specifically trying to encourage a plowing, because that's what she really wanted.
And it was what I suggested, which apparently really tempted her. I think she was looking for it all along.
I wonder what kind of girl is specifically looking for a plowing?
Maybe all of them.
Think this is what she was looking for. Because oddly enough, I also wanted to pull her hair.
Fell in love with a hoe looking for dick. And made a hoe fall in love.
Since bisexuals are whores, she could've very well been a bisexual looking for dick. I did get that impression, she was looking for something in my pants, just that I don't ordinarily come across girls like that, so I wasn't going to assume it.
I think many girls can sense the disappointment when they realize I'm not finding they're someone I would love. I think a few of them become a little bit disappointed too, because maybe they were hoping too. It's not surprising they're /really/ trying to find it just as I am.
Lady Gaga sure likes poisoning people if it can be inferred from her music videos, lol.
So far:
paparazzi
telephone
The mix between sexual desire and love was intertwined just as much as it seems like in this video, lol.
[youtube]gKeoEGHo3MY[/youtube]
The HEB chick seemed to be as sexually focused as lady gaga seems to be. All the slutty dressed gals in Telephone.
Maybe she was a slut. That's what the dictionary has labeled her, lol. It wouldn't be surprising if I was the male version of the slut, in terms of the intertwining of love and sexual desire. I think that's actually fairly normal. Many indications suggest high chemistry relationships tend to be among the longest lasting ones.
http://www.nme.com/news/music/lady-gaga-369-1290567
Lady gaga getting called a slut in highschool? NO WAY! Lol. Not hard to see at all. The HEB chick was almost just like lady gaga in that way, and almost as weird.
"If I kiss you, I'm going to miss you"
Guarantee the HEB chick missed me.'
"A slut's ability to bond is simply not their"
Hmm....
The HEB chick had no problem with bonding.
It's hard to tell if she was "a real slut". Her real self didn't seem like it, but all the provocations and encouragements suggested otherwise, lol. It's very possible she was not really a promiscuous slut with the inability to bond, but she was highly sexual. (Although, a careful review of her nonverbal behavior does suggest plausible bonding impairments. In what way exactly... I'm not sure... with the normal people? But no problems with others like her? Or does she have problems across the board? I suspect she's like me, in that little bonding with most normal people, but definitely no bonding issue with self-similars. Forever committed. And now I'm getting a little teary reading that.)
Like my sister, she's sexual but she obviously has no problems with bonding.
Although, it is questionable how faithful she really is, lol. I don't think she's promiscuous, though.
So far:
paparazzi
telephone
The mix between sexual desire and love was intertwined just as much as it seems like in this video, lol.
[youtube]gKeoEGHo3MY[/youtube]
The HEB chick seemed to be as sexually focused as lady gaga seems to be. All the slutty dressed gals in Telephone.
Maybe she was a slut. That's what the dictionary has labeled her, lol. It wouldn't be surprising if I was the male version of the slut, in terms of the intertwining of love and sexual desire. I think that's actually fairly normal. Many indications suggest high chemistry relationships tend to be among the longest lasting ones.
http://www.nme.com/news/music/lady-gaga-369-1290567
Lady gaga getting called a slut in highschool? NO WAY! Lol. Not hard to see at all. The HEB chick was almost just like lady gaga in that way, and almost as weird.
"If I kiss you, I'm going to miss you"
Guarantee the HEB chick missed me.'
"A slut's ability to bond is simply not their"
Hmm....
The HEB chick had no problem with bonding.
It's hard to tell if she was "a real slut". Her real self didn't seem like it, but all the provocations and encouragements suggested otherwise, lol. It's very possible she was not really a promiscuous slut with the inability to bond, but she was highly sexual. (Although, a careful review of her nonverbal behavior does suggest plausible bonding impairments. In what way exactly... I'm not sure... with the normal people? But no problems with others like her? Or does she have problems across the board? I suspect she's like me, in that little bonding with most normal people, but definitely no bonding issue with self-similars. Forever committed. And now I'm getting a little teary reading that.)
Like my sister, she's sexual but she obviously has no problems with bonding.
Although, it is questionable how faithful she really is, lol. I don't think she's promiscuous, though.
Dauntless
100 TW
swbluto said:
Not what I said at all. Dreams are from your imagination. As is TV fiction. They put on a TV series about a female Secretary of State. Prior to that about a female President. Was that random in both cases, or did it have to do with Hillary running for President in 2008 and then becoming Secretary? The stories are fiction, but they were someone's take on real life, as were the individual incidents of each episode. That doesn't make them TRUE, but still based on reality. So the President show failed, the Secretary of State show remains on the air. Coincidence?
You believe some of these dreams as messages on real life because you wish to. That's why you had the dream. My recurring not quite nightmare of several years back where I climb the outside ladder of this tower that's as much as a mile up, then of course it curves out and I'm leaning backward to get to the top. And I have to crawl up and over the ledge without handholds to get to a flat surface finally and get in the tower. That seems like my life, but I'm not going to have to climb that tower for real. I didn't want to crawl over that ledge, but I didn't want to back down the ladder for a mile either.
She's calling you a racoon because you're trying to fake your way with women. Hoping they'll be dumb enough to fall for this ridiculous I'm too kewl act where in real ife they know you're making a fool of yourself but you imagine they're tricked. Somewhere inside you know you're wrong, she's an avatar delivering the message. Being brave means give up the cowardly act.
Dauntless
100 TW
swbluto said:
Imagine if you'd known her for more than 40 seconds. That would have taken away some of the hurt when you got rid of her, eh? It's your fantasy you're grieving over, you lost that loving feeling for what you're imagining. For all you know you're encountering her elsewhere and not even recognizing her, because she's the real thing and not what you dreamed up on your own.
News story of this guy who had, years later, taken to harassing an exgirlfriend long distance. She wasn't there to abuse in person, so he did I don't remember what all. So he's dragged into court and she's there. He didn't recognize her. She didn't behave as he expected her to behave in that situation. He admitted he was not face to face with the phantom he'd decided to harass.
Dang, I can just imagine when you decide you see some unsuspecting woman who *IS* the H.E.B. chick. And with all your nonsense about her being a "Psychopath" and "Meaning Harm" you seek revenge. . . .
Dauntless said:
Mmmm... you don't seek revenge on someone you love. That just doesn't happen. You might seek explanations for perceived transgressions, but revenge isn't the first thought like it would be with enemies. All my hypotheticals are just the various plausible explanations for the mysterious end-note.
Anyway, I don't expect to find her. I've long given up on that notion. I mean, I guess I still harbor that fantasy that I'll stumble across her one day, but the probabilities don't add up. Posting on craigslist missing connections is pretty much my highest chance, lol.
This place isn't like Spokane, with many commonly used public areas. Everyone's in cars, and there's stores everywhere, the chance you're going to stumble across someone who doesn't happen to work somewhere is minuscule.
And could be like what Cindy Lauper has written, "Some boys take a beautiful girl and hide her away from the rest of the world". Maybe someone took her. Maybe she moved across the state to move in with relatives. If she was underage, and there's hints suggesting that might be the case despite the would be inexplicable sense of urgency at the end in that case, maybe her parents are hiding her. I could also hypothesize "maybe she's homeless", but... that just doesn't seem likely...
It IS mysterious how both she AND her little helper were both gone a month later. The two acted like friends, so both being gone simultaneously a month later is mysterious. That might suggest they were both pulled by parents.
It's interesting to speculate maybe the heb chick happened to have a sophomoric personality because she was immature or something...
But, her little helper also didn't seem to have an adult personality either. The little I heard from her, a comforting "awwwwww".... made me think she really wasn't that old.
And the HEB chick definitely had a higher pitched voice, unlike most adult females. I don't really have enough experience to know what "juvenile voices" sound like, but I'd swear that it sounded like one since no adult female I've across sounds like her. They all have lower pitched voices.
Of course... maybe she was taken or moved... and her friend had no one she knew there, so she quit. I guess that's an explanation.
The sense of urgency at the end as if she didn't find what she was seeking in me but she apparently thought she did (She kept looking back and forth at me I guess hoping to find a sign I'd come thru.) was just odd. That's why I think she was seeking residence.
You know...
She gave that disappointed sigh as if she couldn't see it happening. I wonder what that was about?
It came right on the heels of pretending she's leading me out to somewhere private...
I think I'm going to interpet that as "I really want to sleep with you, but I can't [right now].".
Thought it might've been something else like....
"Oh, I have a boyfriend, this will never work".
or
"I'm going into the army to become an army medic, this will never work".
or
"I'm under the legal age limit, this will never work."
She wasn't a dumb kid. She was intelligent. There's a chance she knew of things like legal age limits.
On that Love Game song... someone wrote...
Oh, that's what she meant by her heart can quit in 3 seconds. Either now or never!
That's pretty much how it was the HEB chick, as soon as the lust rushed, I delayed a little bit, then acted it on quickly and ferociously and she was quickly overwhelmed. That's probably why she was disappointed it couldn't be done right then... Like gaga, it's now or never. But she saw promise in me and she understood the limiting circumstances, she looked like she was willing to make an exception, lol.
I guess that understanding makes me think... yeah, she's a slut, lol.
I don't think I would've made a move like that if she weren't, however. Because I think she was purposefully arousing me from the very beginning, setting the stage, and that would've been unlikely to occur had that arousal not already been in place. That's something most girls aren't doing.
I think she was trying to arouse in seeking residence, but she apparently was fine with fudging right then and there, too. lol
So, she was a slut with a penchant for rough sex looking for residence.
I think I have adequately identified who she is, now.
Age is the big question mark.
I'm guessing just graduated high school.
So she'd be the "skanky slut" the old guy on craigslist was warning [me,craigslist readers] about who likes to cause financial shambles when guys marry them, such as was the case with him and his son. Not his gay son, however, who was doing fantastic.
And I had a feeling she was sniffing for money when she gave me an appraising look when asking "What have you been doing lately?". Then she started doing the sexual provocations soon after she inferred I had a logging job.
I did make her fall in love, though. Maybe that changes things...
She gave that disappointed sigh as if she couldn't see it happening. I wonder what that was about?
It came right on the heels of pretending she's leading me out to somewhere private...
I think I'm going to interpet that as "I really want to sleep with you, but I can't [right now].".
Thought it might've been something else like....
"Oh, I have a boyfriend, this will never work".
or
"I'm going into the army to become an army medic, this will never work".
or
"I'm under the legal age limit, this will never work."
She wasn't a dumb kid. She was intelligent. There's a chance she knew of things like legal age limits.
On that Love Game song... someone wrote...
Oh, that's what she meant by her heart can quit in 3 seconds. Either now or never!
That's pretty much how it was the HEB chick, as soon as the lust rushed, I delayed a little bit, then acted it on quickly and ferociously and she was quickly overwhelmed. That's probably why she was disappointed it couldn't be done right then... Like gaga, it's now or never. But she saw promise in me and she understood the limiting circumstances, she looked like she was willing to make an exception, lol.
I guess that understanding makes me think... yeah, she's a slut, lol.
I don't think I would've made a move like that if she weren't, however. Because I think she was purposefully arousing me from the very beginning, setting the stage, and that would've been unlikely to occur had that arousal not already been in place. That's something most girls aren't doing.
I think she was trying to arouse in seeking residence, but she apparently was fine with fudging right then and there, too. lol
So, she was a slut with a penchant for rough sex looking for residence.
I think I have adequately identified who she is, now.
Age is the big question mark.
I'm guessing just graduated high school.
So she'd be the "skanky slut" the old guy on craigslist was warning [me,craigslist readers] about who likes to cause financial shambles when guys marry them, such as was the case with him and his son. Not his gay son, however, who was doing fantastic.
And I had a feeling she was sniffing for money when she gave me an appraising look when asking "What have you been doing lately?". Then she started doing the sexual provocations soon after she inferred I had a logging job.
I did make her fall in love, though. Maybe that changes things...
You know, I wonder...
if I could create an air conditionable space large enough for house construction, with solar panels over it which would provide shade for the air conditioned space (So it's not being heated directly), and also power for the air conditioners. It'd also keep out the mosquitos and other blood suckers, ideally.
In a place like Houston, it'd potentially enable year round construction.
I'm thinking maybe a metal scaffold with plastic over it.
Or maybe just a wooden frame of some kind...
Maybe a geodesic design using metal tubes would apply here...
if I could create an air conditionable space large enough for house construction, with solar panels over it which would provide shade for the air conditioned space (So it's not being heated directly), and also power for the air conditioners. It'd also keep out the mosquitos and other blood suckers, ideally.
In a place like Houston, it'd potentially enable year round construction.
I'm thinking maybe a metal scaffold with plastic over it.
Or maybe just a wooden frame of some kind...
Maybe a geodesic design using metal tubes would apply here...
Wow, $40/sales for this week if I extrapolated for the next 3 days.
My income has never been that low.
Past januaries were among my hottest months too...
It's puzzling. I guess if people overspent and they're now paying off christmas debt, maybe that's reflecting in this january this year.
Thank goodness I had gangbuster sales. My living expenses are at $200/month, so I can weather quite a few months if needed.
My income has never been that low.
Past januaries were among my hottest months too...
It's puzzling. I guess if people overspent and they're now paying off christmas debt, maybe that's reflecting in this january this year.
Thank goodness I had gangbuster sales. My living expenses are at $200/month, so I can weather quite a few months if needed.
http://www.gamesgames.com/game/get-your-boyfriend
I'm playing this. Learning how to get a boyfriend. Apparently just need to adjust ties and comb my hair, lol.
"She is charming. I like her very much".
Oh, isn't that interesting, because I said much the same about the HEB chick. She was so charming.
I'm playing this. Learning how to get a boyfriend. Apparently just need to adjust ties and comb my hair, lol.
"She is charming. I like her very much".
Oh, isn't that interesting, because I said much the same about the HEB chick. She was so charming.
https://www.quora.com/What-is-it-like-buying-a-prostitute-in-Bangkok
He discovered his raison d'etre screwing some bangkok workers.
I discovered my raison d'etre gazing into the HEB chick's eyes and creating a sexual pairbond in the process. (i.e., gf/bf)
Those were the best 2 hours of his life, the heb chick situation was the best day of my life.
The overlap is interesting...
sex=meaning of life.
I've had intimate relations, but never really created a sexual pairbond like I did with the HEB chick. So while those intimate relations were highly pleasurable, they definitely weren't some kind of "happiest day ever" / "meaning of life" kind of event.
It's interesting this sexual pairbond. Because I don't think I can create it with just anyone. I've had girls gaze into my eyes, and while I might feel uncomfortable or anxious or some such... definitely no pairbonding going on. So there's something else going on. I'm not really sure what exactly...
I'm guessing establishing it requires some kind of passion/arousal/lust. Because not only do I establish it, but she establishes it thru the sensing of the passion. The passion created with the HEB chick was undeniably "communicated" with her which created the strength of the pairbond, and it was pretty damn strong. I could sense how strongly she was affected not only from the overwhelming emotionality that swept over her as she went into that instinctive tinged-by-sadness/immense-beauty/intense-yearning expression facial expression which was dramatic as hell, but also by the strength of the chemical addiction when I rejected her, which could be seen in her weakness, tremors and uncontrollable shaking.
Maybe this "unique property" that's required to establish the bond is called love?
It definitely seems I cannot create the bond with someone I don't love, which is the vast majority of girls. I think arousal has something to do with it... though...
It does make sense that significant sexual arousal would be necessary to establish a strong sexual pairbond.
I still don't think any girl can create that /kind/ of arousal. The kind that feels like /deep/ love.
It was like we were married...
in some ways, marriage represents a sexual pairbond. Many girls, whites especially, will not have sex unless they are married.
At the time, I didn't know eye gazing created sexual pairbonds. I thought I was telling her I liked her a lot with my eyes. But that distinct feeling in my brain like some kind of intense arousal during the first 10 seconds of the eyelock... "sexual tension"... (Probably in the hippocampus)...THAT was the sexual pairbond and she developed it too. At that point, her chemical addiction to me was established.
She and I then went onto have the happiest day of our life. And, in my case, many days of great sadness many months later with her prolonged absence. She probably missed me terribly, too. For how long, I don't know... maybe another sexual pairbond was established with her not too long after. I know, personally, any girl who tried creating a sexual pairbond with myself just made me angry. And, it still might be the case, I know it was the case just a month ago.
The swedish house mafia has no love/relationship songs. Lots of male bands seem to have no love/relationship songs. Isn't that interesting? It almost seems like it's particular to female artists.
What are the symptoms of falling in love?
Anxiety, panic and despair... yep... precisely what happened when I rejected her.
Despair... what periodically happens to me even these days when something strongly reminds me of her. Or what we had.
The first day, she definitely had immense exhilaration. I really have a hard time she'd be capable of hiding it from someone (Say, parents).
Even if her parents made her quit, I'm sure that girl was exceptionally happy I did that. I don't think she's mad at me for that.
It's interesting, I forced her to fall in love with me. She didn't really have a choice. I guess in some hypothetical way, she could have (she could've looked away,etc.), which she did by the way... she looked left, then right... but it appears she thought about it and then her eyes met mine. So I guess she chose to engage. Would she have known the affects I wonder and wanted them? Was she just curious? I wonder why she chose to engage.
I think she got a taste of it when saw me for that split second, and then that's when she looked left/right in deciding if she wanted to continue... she probably thought she wanted more. And, sure enough, she ended up as one exhilarating chick.
It's interesting about that despair. Because you read some of my early ramblings, you'll see moments of great despair when I focus so much on some small part of the situation and how I "screwed it up"(But, I didn't actually). And there were definitely moments of euphoria. Alternating despair and euphoria definitely marked the first 4 weeks.
He discovered his raison d'etre screwing some bangkok workers.
I discovered my raison d'etre gazing into the HEB chick's eyes and creating a sexual pairbond in the process. (i.e., gf/bf)
Those were the best 2 hours of his life, the heb chick situation was the best day of my life.
The overlap is interesting...
sex=meaning of life.
I've had intimate relations, but never really created a sexual pairbond like I did with the HEB chick. So while those intimate relations were highly pleasurable, they definitely weren't some kind of "happiest day ever" / "meaning of life" kind of event.
It's interesting this sexual pairbond. Because I don't think I can create it with just anyone. I've had girls gaze into my eyes, and while I might feel uncomfortable or anxious or some such... definitely no pairbonding going on. So there's something else going on. I'm not really sure what exactly...
I'm guessing establishing it requires some kind of passion/arousal/lust. Because not only do I establish it, but she establishes it thru the sensing of the passion. The passion created with the HEB chick was undeniably "communicated" with her which created the strength of the pairbond, and it was pretty damn strong. I could sense how strongly she was affected not only from the overwhelming emotionality that swept over her as she went into that instinctive tinged-by-sadness/immense-beauty/intense-yearning expression facial expression which was dramatic as hell, but also by the strength of the chemical addiction when I rejected her, which could be seen in her weakness, tremors and uncontrollable shaking.
Maybe this "unique property" that's required to establish the bond is called love?
It definitely seems I cannot create the bond with someone I don't love, which is the vast majority of girls. I think arousal has something to do with it... though...
It does make sense that significant sexual arousal would be necessary to establish a strong sexual pairbond.
I still don't think any girl can create that /kind/ of arousal. The kind that feels like /deep/ love.
It was like we were married...
in some ways, marriage represents a sexual pairbond. Many girls, whites especially, will not have sex unless they are married.
At the time, I didn't know eye gazing created sexual pairbonds. I thought I was telling her I liked her a lot with my eyes. But that distinct feeling in my brain like some kind of intense arousal during the first 10 seconds of the eyelock... "sexual tension"... (Probably in the hippocampus)...THAT was the sexual pairbond and she developed it too. At that point, her chemical addiction to me was established.
She and I then went onto have the happiest day of our life. And, in my case, many days of great sadness many months later with her prolonged absence. She probably missed me terribly, too. For how long, I don't know... maybe another sexual pairbond was established with her not too long after. I know, personally, any girl who tried creating a sexual pairbond with myself just made me angry. And, it still might be the case, I know it was the case just a month ago.
The swedish house mafia has no love/relationship songs. Lots of male bands seem to have no love/relationship songs. Isn't that interesting? It almost seems like it's particular to female artists.
What are the symptoms of falling in love?
Anxiety, panic and despair... yep... precisely what happened when I rejected her.
Despair... what periodically happens to me even these days when something strongly reminds me of her. Or what we had.
The first day, she definitely had immense exhilaration. I really have a hard time she'd be capable of hiding it from someone (Say, parents).
Even if her parents made her quit, I'm sure that girl was exceptionally happy I did that. I don't think she's mad at me for that.
It's interesting, I forced her to fall in love with me. She didn't really have a choice. I guess in some hypothetical way, she could have (she could've looked away,etc.), which she did by the way... she looked left, then right... but it appears she thought about it and then her eyes met mine. So I guess she chose to engage. Would she have known the affects I wonder and wanted them? Was she just curious? I wonder why she chose to engage.
I think she got a taste of it when saw me for that split second, and then that's when she looked left/right in deciding if she wanted to continue... she probably thought she wanted more. And, sure enough, she ended up as one exhilarating chick.
It's interesting about that despair. Because you read some of my early ramblings, you'll see moments of great despair when I focus so much on some small part of the situation and how I "screwed it up"(But, I didn't actually). And there were definitely moments of euphoria. Alternating despair and euphoria definitely marked the first 4 weeks.
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