What are our bike alarm noisemaker options?

[Reid Welch]

Is there a cheap system ready to buy and bolt on, worth having?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNL9qEP51T4
No information about how to buy or if it is even an add-on product

This unit seems ideal enough, simple, auto setting, and could be mounted semi-hidden;
an adjunct to our chain or u-locks. BUT IT DOES NOT SEEM TO BE available anymore, if it ever was available.
Take a look. IMO it's in the right direction; not perfect, but an aid to disuade
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAdxNdR3P5k
A.K.A. Ducharme Alarm Demonstration Video

---

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzmyKrSJE-0
Deal Extreme's offering
$3.50US postpaid from China

__________

I want a simple alarm for my bike. Any ideas? Justin, are you reading and thinking of new products?
Our ebikes offer lots of places to hide or custom in-build a baffling LOUD motion-sensing alarm,
but I'm not DIY-skilled enough to design such a thing on my own. Help!

 

[Reid Welch]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8qj4rkfINo
"Let that be a lesson to you" (funny)

------
The sadistic element of my personality conceives of a battery-free, mechanical scream alarm.
I will describe it here:

A spring loaded icepick, mounted below the cushy seat. Normally, it is locked against release.
But when set, its trigger-interlock is removed. When the thief jumps aboard, the prong pierces his buttock,
preferably around the anus area, and a 130dB human shriek ensues, and the bike is laid down,
and the owner, if within a one block radius is alerted, comes and gets his bike, and all is well.
MUST be careful to fully, safely LOCK the spike against any possibility of self-actuation. A carabiner lock would suffice,
and be invisible; but the owner must always remember to have this device locked before riding.
There will be little blood but much fun, and waterproof, and no battery needed and no real physical harm:
the spike should eject above the seat by only about half an inch or so. Sort of a bear trap, as it were.

 

[Reid Welch]

For starters, I will order a couple of these, so cheap.
Will report later how well it works. Can mount this under my battery's basket: stealth

http://www.dealextreme.com/details.dx/sku.21760
The deal extreme bike alarm as seen in the video in posting number one above

 

[HAL9000v2.0]

I have a system that connect all 3 fazes of motor together and this makes it impossible to pedal more then 2-3 kph.

 

[Reid Welch]

I have a system that connect all 3 fazes of motor together and this makes it impossible to pedal more then 2-3 kph.

This makes good sense for a non-geared hub motor; for geared, freewheeling motors, would it work at all?
Got a wiring diagram (crude is OK).

Also, the great deterent of a noisemaker (or icepick through the seat) is the SONIC alarm, early warning, that somebody
has just touched or tried to lift, move, or sit on the bike. I'm really favoring the James Bond Ass Stabber idea as an adjunct alarm.
Imagine the mix of sounds from a wailing electronic alarm and a wailing life loser? It'd be much fun.

I carry a switchblade knife when riding, for the day when I get bumped off my bike by some 'jackers.
Not that I am a blood-loving nut, but...I WILL defend my life and property with cutting force.

 

[Puppyjump]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8qj4rkfINo
"Let that be a lesson to you" (funny)

------
The sadistic element of my personality conceives of a battery-free, mechanical scream alarm.
I will describe it here:

A spring loaded icepick, mounted below the cushy seat. Normally, it is locked against release....

You can't rig your personal property to cause harm to a thief. I read of a guy who kept getting his car stereo stolen, so he rigged up some fish hooks up behind the unit behind the dash. Sure enough, someone tried to steal the radio and got his hand stuck up behind the dash on the hooks and had to get some kind of surgeon to get him free of the car...ouch... The car's owner went to jail and probably got sued in civil court.

 

[Reid Welch]

^ ^
I =can= do whatever I want. A non-lethal prick in the ass is not only fair, but ethical punishment for a jump-on-and-ride asshole thief. No jury would convict me.

In fact, in good ol' Florida, if "you" (I mean an intruder, not you yourself) were to step foot on my mate's property (I'm penniless, myself, but live here for many a year), and were not invited,
and if I perceived "you" to be an interloper: the law allows me to shoot the interloper dead
with a gun, or incapacitate however I like: protection of life and property.

What's not legal is to set lethal booby traps that could, in a bad situation, harm a law enforcement officer doing his job, a fireman, etc.
But those kinds don't normally hop on an unattended bike not their own.

At any rate: I have nothing to sue for, and the publicity of a lowlife suing a poor man because the poor guy's bike seat stabbed his rump with a prick of steel,
is too much fun to miss. It'd make worldwide news: funny stuff of the day.

Case dismissed. I wouldn't even offer the victim a Band Aid.

______________

PS: inventing, imagining, conceiving: install a T-nut under a bike seat, say, for a 3/8" bolt. Drill the end of the bolt to receive a soldered-in sharp nail, to protrude from the bolt by about an inch or so. The bike seat here is cushioned, padded.
To set the discomfort device :

Park the bike. Lock the bike. Reach under the seat and manually turn the bolt (it's a slight friction fit in its threaded sleeve. Turn the bolt until the prick-point can just barely be felt, flush with the lycra-foam padded fanny area of the seat.

When the miscreant hops on after having broken or cut the lock: Owwwwww!
And no real harm done, but he can't stand on the pedals of this bike to ride away;
he must sit down.

Pain is the greater of two evils here: pain beats buttocks, rocks wrap paper, scissors cut paper, and rock breaks scissors.

Invent nice things for public fun; like ebikes and arse prickers.


-----

You can't rig your personal property to cause harm to a thief. I read of a guy who kept getting his car stereo stolen, so he rigged up some fish hooks up behind the unit behind the dash. Sure enough, someone tried to steal the radio and got his hand stuck up behind the dash on the hooks and had to get some kind of surgeon to get him free of the car...ouch... The car's owner went to jail and probably got sued in civil court.

Got a citation, a link? Otherwise this is just hearsay, urban legend, and not very credible.

What would be credible and culpable: setting your home alarm to release acid into a bucket of potassium cyanide, to create lethal gas, killing anyone who entered the house, setting off the trap.
That would be a criminal act because a fireman, or policeman investigating could be harmed.

I do not think po-po or firemen often go searching behind dashboards trying to steal car radios.
And who is to say I can't store my fishing tackle behind the dashboard, anyway?
I like to fish for whoppers, besides. :wink:

 

[Brainersan]

How about using the bike to defend itself by generating a force field until disabled by a kill switch, such that touching of the metal frame or handlebars would create a shock? Some sort of reverse polarity. I do like the ass thumper in concept.

 

[spinningmagnets]

There are motion-sensors for hotel door-knobs, and also for attaching to laptops. Here's one example:

I saw a Google story recently about "smart lock sprays bicycle thieves with dye". the attached story showed a thief with bolt-cutters and the alarm shrieked to alert you (sipping your espresso while reading the morning paper at an outdoor cafe) and as he ran away, he was marked with dye (visible, and also invisible UV dye).

 

[Puppyjump]

You can't rig your personal property to cause harm to a thief. I read of a guy who kept getting his car stereo stolen, so he rigged up some fish hooks up behind the unit behind the dash. Sure enough, someone tried to steal the radio and got his hand stuck up behind the dash on the hooks and had to get some kind of surgeon to get him free of the car...ouch... The car's owner went to jail and probably got sued in civil court.

Got a citation, a link? Otherwise this is just hearsay, urban legend, and not very credible.[/quote]

No, I don't have a citation, nor do I remember exactly where I heard about this except that it was in the media, either the newspaper, TV, or radio. Still, if you can think of something, chances are, it's been done, so I don't doubt that somewhere somebody glued fish hooks on the back of his radio, and it's definately the case that with the courts the way they are, the car owner would get in trouble and the thief could also bring a big civil suit.

I'm not offering an opinion as to whether such a thing is ethical or not, but you could argue that a fish-hooked radio thief got what he deserved.

One way to avoid getting in trouble in the case of a boobytrapped bike would be to do it to a bike that is not worth much. If you see it caught someone, then simply walk right past it and go buy another bike.

 

[curious]

One of the options specific to our ebikes is to short motor phases in a semi-hidden place (perhaps inside a hub itself to make it harder for a thief to disconnect). The sheer weight of ebike makes it hard to carry away quickly. Plus some kind of talking alarm with proximity sensor to warn potential thief in plain words that the bike is well protected.

 

[Reid Welch]

Knowing the low quality and zero quality control, I ordered four of these units last week.

Today they arrived, fifteen minutes ago, in fact.

Nine volt battery not included.

Two of the four are DOA (as rather expected).

Two work OK. One works so supremely well, I just got to get a picture and video of the unit.
It's sitting on my computer desk at the moment. It is so sensitive, in any position, that just tapping the table,
sets off the alarm.

The alarm runs for about ten seconds with a distinctive, loud warble, then shuts off, reset.
continuous movement keeps the alarm sounding.
There is a toy key switch that, when turned, powers the unit. There is about a ten second delay upon turn-on,
and no delay for turn-off.

Let me get a picture of the working unit and post it up here pronto.
This unit, cheap as it is, offers some stealth mounting possibilities,
could be re-cased in a waterproof, armored case, hidden just about anywhere,
speaker split from the unit and remotely located, etc.

For $3.50 delivered, get several to ensure you have a working-one in the group,
and go to town and have fun!

Pictures to follow of the unmou$%^nted alarm....

!

The gibberish above owes to some glitch in the software here, temporary; or my ISP.
I'll get a still and a video up ASAP as soon as possible. Tanks,
Shermans.

r.

 

[Reid Welch]

[youtube]QqeP4-twlpw[/youtube]

 

[curious]

"Sounds good" but do you think anyone except perhaps a police officer would react to a guy riding a bike with the buzzer on ?
I think there should be a warning sign (visible and/or audio) that bike has multiple levels of protection and then some sort of electronic hub locking that is not typical for a thief with conventional skills of breaking bike locks. On top of that some 130db buzzer would help (above pain threshold within few feet). After all, there is plenty of power in the pack .

 

[curious]

I'm not offering an opinion as to whether such a thing is ethical or not, but you could argue that a fish-hooked radio thief got what he deserved.

This is a bit off-topic but every law strives to match severity of crime and punishment. In case of this story it is well accomplished. The guy would not become disabled but would get permanent scars to remind him on what is good and what is bad in life. And thief intentions can be proven beyond any doubt. Killing the guy with cyanide or cutting his leg off with animal trap would be a bit of an overkill though

Moreover I am of the opinion that jail time should be replaced with corporal punishment, Singapore style, for all non-violent crime. It is much more sadistic IMHO to get few years of a person life with very high chance of a person actually becoming worse in prison than to put few painful scars on his body as a lifelong reminder. And cheaper for the society too.

And no, I am not a bloodthirsty type of guy. I actually think the society is too brutal to offenders (here in US). Having by far the highest percentage of population behind bars among civilized nations is not a sign of prudent and humane policy.