Yup, DC isn't AC.
I'd built a box that pre-charged the controller caps through a resistor before engaging a relay (intended for AC switching, and rated at 30A/277VAC), thus eliminating the arc on "turn on". It worked flawlessly, until I had a failure which caused the relay to fall out while the controller was drawing a significant current. The contacts in the relay pulled an arc when they opened (or, more like it, "tried" to open) which was sustained until I let off the throttle, rendering the relay contacts instant welded garbage. It all worked perfectly to that point.
Using a proper DC contactor seems overkill, so I'm continuing to play with automotive relays and better circuitry - but I'm treading lightly. AC is easier on relays because it falls through zero volts as the current "alternates". The same reason people survive much higher voltage AC shocks than anyone who has been unfortunate enough to touch a high potential DC source. One feels like a buzz that throws you. The other feels like cooking and apparently locks your muscles, even at similar potential.
I have used small rocker switches (DPST with both poles wired in parallel) on my controllers, which work well, but I know that every time I switch 'em that I've taken a big chunk of their life away. Whichever contact makes first "gets it", until the opposite one starts making first. The switches I got (at a bargain price) are actually cheaper than the Anderson connectors that would otherwise be taking the hit. But I recognized that the switches were being treated as an expendable part in this scheme - hence the pursuit of a pre-charge/relay scheme.
There are simpler solutions, if you don't care about the switch. It's a matter of "feel" for me. I *like* having control of the power at my finger tips, rather than via connectors that are only accessible once I dismount.