News of the Weird

OK this one takes the cake! :shock: Dude cuts off his Jones, then "attempts" suicide by leaping out a 2nd story window. Yo. :?: Man, that's gotta sting. Gonna cut off ma thing, grab that sukka and perch on de 2nd story ledge- sho goona die - ain't no hedge. Aight! Here we go, fallin' kinda slow, life flashin no that's mah wind knocked out yo. Cain't catch mah breath, am I gonna bleed to death? That's the plan oh shit here come the man in the amblance.

Andre Johnson, a rapper affiliated with the Wu-Tang Clan, cut off his penis before attempting suicide today.

Johnson jumped off the second story of a North Hollywood building in the wee hours of the morning on Wednesday, police confirmed to various media outlets. Johnson was severly injured but didn't die. He and his severed penis were taken to Cedars Sinai hospital after the suicide attempt. He's currently being treated there.

No word on reasons why Johnson may have tried to kill himself.

Johnson also reportedly goes by the rap name Christ Bearer. A music video featuring Christ Bearer and Rugged Monk for a song titled "Oooh!" went up on YouTube just yesterday, hours before he cut off his genitalia and attempted suicide.
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EMF said:
OK this one takes the cake! :shock: Dude cuts off his Jones, then "attempts" suicide by leaping out a 2nd story window. Yo. :?: Man, that's gotta sting. Gonna cut off ma thing, grab that sukka and perch on de 2nd story ledge- sho goona die - ain't no hedge. Aight! Here we go, fallin' kinda slow, life flashin no that's mah wind knocked out yo. Cain't catch mah breath, am I gonna bleed to death? That's the plan oh shit here come the man in the amblance.
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I can relate. I mean there are neuron clusters spread around the body/mind and one such is the Muldhara, explaining the other male brain, on the tail end and capable of taking control at any time. Unfortunately, cutting off the tip doesn't do any good, as the plexus runs deep. Should you be possessed of a similar urge, try yoga & meditation first!
 
That would make one effed up word problem.
 
Update: In the news this am. Reattach fails. :cry: You can just call him Andre now.

Edit: In a bizarre twist, Andre, having been moved to the first floor of intensive care and under heavy medications, has decided to reinvent himself. From this point on, he will be known simply as "Shaft" and following a purported mutual agreement overheard in the hospital cafeteria, has left the Wu tang clan, in order to launch his own band: The No Wang clan. He also has just announced his first album: "Nuttin' to frock wit" and reportedly is working hard ( no pun intended ) on the first cut,: "Squat to piss".

Join him on twitter this afternoon #bitch free zone or # Dawg without a bone

Stay tuned!
 
Yikes! And here is another one from the same website: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/04/16/texting-driver-hits-bicyclist-i-dont-care_n_5158966.html

Texting Driver Who Slammed Cyclist: I, Like, 'Just Don't Care'
Poor Kimberley Davis.

The 21-year-old Australian woman was livid when she slammed into a bicyclist while texting late last year, putting dents in her car. The victim suffered a spinal fracture and would spend the next three months in a hospital, but Davis wasn't having any of it, The Standard reports.

"I just don’t care because I’ve already been through a lot of bullshit and my car is, like, pretty expensive and now I have to fix it," she told a responding officer two days after the Sept. 20 collision. "I’m kind of pissed off that the cyclist has hit the side of my car. I don’t agree that people texting and driving could hit a cyclist. I wasn’t on my phone when I hit the cyclist."

Davis, of Port Fairy, pleaded guilty on Monday to dangerous driving and was fined $4,500. Police say she used her phone behind the wheel 44 times before running down the cyclist. She called emergency responders but parked more than 300 feet away from the victim and refused to offer him help.
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Dauntless said:
http://www.treehugger.com/bikes/bike-thief-steals-4000-electric-bike-then-calls-owner-ask-how-recharge-it.html
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Awesome post! Totally a NotW candidate in perfect ebike form 8)

Thanks man! KF
 
As someone who has been an educator for twenty years, sometimes I can predict the future. I kid you not.

I've also become a geneticist of sorts. There are only a few molds out there, and each year I can pretty much match each kid to several others throughout my career who looked and acted the same way. Rarely does someone come along who makes me think, "wow, there's a future Einstein."

But sometimes...maybe a handful of times....I've thought, "whoa. That kid is the one."

The weirdest part of it all is that I've actually outlived some of them.
 
MikeFairbanks said:
As someone who has been an educator for twenty years, sometimes I can predict the future. I kid you not.
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I believe you!!! I also have been ahead of the curve most of my life. Hasn't made me rich, but I can point to a lot of people and say "I told you so!." I think I would rather be rich. :lol:

I think a lot of ES'rs are in the "ahead of the curve" envolop.

MikeFairbanks said:
.........Rarely does someone come along who makes me think, "wow, there's a future Einstein."...
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Ok, Einstein, Hawking , Higgs, take your pick or pick your own,....those kind of people rarely come along. My father and mother were teachers and in the 30 years each of their teaching, nether of them had an Einstein or Hawking or Higgs or anything close.....looking for one in your class room is probably not going to happen. And, if in the extremely unusual occurrence that you do find a genius in your classroom, they will be so weird that you may end up giving them an average grade, or worse. Every genius I have every met, and I have met a few, never do well in a classroom setting anyway. They are so ensconced in that place of which they are "genius", that they can't really do much else. Loser in any other field with the exception of what they are genius in. You may have seen it yourself.

MikeFairbanks said:
The weirdest part of it all is that I've actually outlived some of them.
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Not sure what you mean.....?
 
e-beach said:
MikeFairbanks said:
The weirdest part of it all is that I've actually outlived some of them.
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Not sure what you mean.....?
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Oh, haven't you heard? Mike Fairbanks is alive, ALIVE! Not the first time something like this has happened.

[youtube]MX1MY7NzCA0[/youtube]
 
What I mean by "I've actually outlived some of them" is just that.

I never expected any of my students to pass away before I did, and the first time it happened I was dumbstruck...almost horrified. It seems so unfair.

My first time was a student I taught in my second year. She was a very sweet girl, smart, and had a lot of friends. She was kind to others, but died from cancer in her senior year of high school.

Then, about five years later I taught a really nice, shy kid in the fifth grade who came out of his shell in high school and became popular (but was also unlike a lot of popular kids in that he was kind to others and really friendly). He wasn't remarkable as a fifth grader, but became a handsome and outgoing young man. He was on the cross country team and wrestled in high school.

Three weeks before he graduated high school he went out for a jog one morning and dropped dead of a heart attack. The first thought on everyone's mind was drugs, but it turned out that he had a serious heart defect that was never found. He just went. That was that. Very sad.

--------

Onto a different child: There was a girl I taught (also fifth grade. She's still alive and well and a junior in college). During the fifth grade they held a talent contest for students. She wasn't allowed to compete, and for a very good reason: She was a genius on the dance floor. Instead of letting her compete (which she didn't want to do anyway) she got to go last. Her dance performances were jaw-dropping. The first time I saw her perform I thought, "Yep, that one is going to be a household name some day." She had very true and very real professional talent. It was in the way she moved, the way she blended with the music, and the way she expressed herself emotionally through the music (every muscle, every body part, her face).

I still keep up with her from time to time. She is on a dance team at her university. My biggest surprise is that she decided to be a normal kid in high school and college. If she wants to she can take fame and fortune anytime she chooses. She gets it. Like a Bette Middler, Streisand, Bill Cosby, or any other talent that can just figure it out in a moment.

And right now: I have a student who wears his heart on his sleeve, and it really messes him up (self-esteem), but he's a mathematical and technological genius. He's finally becoming aware of it and accepting our praise (he troubleshoots all the computers...teachers call my classroom to ask for him, and he rarely fails to fix it). For most of the year he could not accept a compliment and complained of his "stupidity" several times a day. It seems that a lot of people who really are less than average intelligence tried to cut him down by projecting their own shortcomings onto him, and it worked.

I really hope he makes it, because he will make the world a better place. He's a Steve Jobs, but without the mean streak.

Some day I'll write a book about all the cool stuff I've seen in kids (and the not-so-cool stuff that they should have never had to deal with. Some of them are a lot tougher than I could ever be in the same situation).

You can learn a lot from a kid.
 
Dauntless said:
e-beach said:
MikeFairbanks said:
The weirdest part of it all is that I've actually outlived some of them.
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Not sure what you mean.....?
Click to expand...

Oh, haven't you heard? Mike Fairbanks is alive, ALIVE! Not the first time something like this has happened.
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Uhhhh. Ummmm. Yeah.... Something like that. :shock: And tell Tina "congratulations" for me. I think. :?:
 
http://www.laobserved.com/archive/2014/05/shirtless_man_discovers_t.php
KTLA's Courtney Friel was covering the afternoon's brush fire in the Inland Empire foothills on Wednesday when she asked a shirtless man carrying a dog if he was fleeing the flames. He said no, he lives down the street and was just checking out the "pretty cool" fire. His first line, however, made him go a little viral on YouTube. "Wow you're super pretty," he opened. "Do you want to go on a date sometime?"

Friel's reply: "You're on the air live right now on KTLA, actually."

After that, I thought her live report became a bit...flustered.
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"What do you think of the fire [that is destroying your neighborhood]?" she asks.
"It's pretty cool!" he responds.

[youtube]LEwF27TjU6M[/youtube]
 
Hard 'G' Or Soft, The GIF Takes Its Place As A Modern Art Form

The article itself is so-so. What's oddly entertaining is the insistence of the correct pronunciation by commenters ad nauseam.

FWIW, in software development it is mostly pronounced with a hard-G, like good-day or good-bye. Though occasionally I hear it the other way; those people tend to stick out like a nail... they probably pronounce "data" as "dah-tah" instead of "day-ta" :p

Saving in Pee En Gee; the superior & royalty-free format, KF
 
http://gawker.com/hero-cat-rescues-toddler-from-evil-dog-1576302597


[youtube]gGDoB1PLxzo[/youtube]
 
From Bakersfield, CA. Hehe... Seen here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bakersfield,_California

As of 2013, when measured by atmospheric particulate matter—specifically PM10, particles of 10 µm or less—Bakersfield is listed as having the worst air in the United States.
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And surrounding area?
Kern County is the most oil productive county in America, with around 10% of the nation’s domestic production.
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Not related of course.

I thought "Bakersfield" sounded familiar. Seen elsewhere "September 1986: Jim Harrer starts Mustang Software in the bedroom of his Bakersfield, California home."

That "Wildcat" BBS software was what I used to run my dialup system "back in the day".
 
Bakersfield is about 104 miles south of Fresno, where I’m originally from. I have driven through it countless times on my way from Point-A to Point-B, maybe stopping for gas once. That corner of the Valley gets pretty bad air because there is no outlet, so everything that blows in from the SF Bay Area and the Valley-North ends up down near Fresno and Bakersfield, like a big gigantic bathtub with a nasty fouled drain. Eventually the smog will rise and leak out southeast lip over The Tehachapi’s (the mountain pass on Barstow-Bakersfield Hwy 58), creating a unique wall of smog heading towards Mojave and desert points east.

In addition, Bakersfield is the home of Hee Haw co-host Buck Owens; my Dad watched that show religiously every Saturday... and in an odd sort of way I came to appreciate country music kornball humor. I never thought of Bakersfield as being weird, although to this day I prefer to call it “Baker’s Patch”... probably because of Hee Haw. Then again it is a strangely odd place to be from.

Onward to other news...

Car Mechanics Stage Prank Murder On Google Streetview

140603135111-edinburgh-google-street-view-series-story-top.jpg


In quite possibly the best prank to ever hit this new digitized map world, a Scottish mechanic and his buddies staged a fake murder on Google Street View. It took longer than you might think for people to figure out what they'd done.

"Giles Street is like a misshapen horseshoe. By chance, I saw the Street View car going in other leg. I knew it would reach us in half a minute. I had just enough time to whip in, grab Gary and a pick-ax handle and he came out to give me a so called 'Leith massage,' which is essentially being bashed."
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On you go!
Sláinte, KF :wink:
 
When it rains... here's another one for you:

Magnetic field inspires dog defecation dance, says study

Reuters said:
Dogs use the Earth's magnetic fields to align their position while defecating, according to new research. A team from the Czech Republic and Germany studied the body positions of 70 dogs across 37 breeds while they excreted, and found that they preferred to poop while aligned with the north-south axis. Jim Drury has more.
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[youtube]l24fUCCKGEI[/youtube]

I struggled to take this video seriously... especially during the pooping moments :lol:

Now I know another method for finding my way in the fog.
Frankly, I am much relieved. KF
 
20 years ago - O.J. Simpson's Bronco Chase: 'Theater of the Absurd'

I hate to pay homage to this asshole, but this is likely the king of weirdness, or at the very least - in the top 10.

:?: Where were you when this unfolded?

KF said:
I was in the garage just wrapping up a 1/2 barrel homebrewing session with my buddy - enjoying the ballgame on the Telly when the game was interrupted by this farcical nonsense. I mean - they interrupted the NBA playoffs for godsakes! :evil:
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It is in my estimation - the worst of two worlds colliding to manufacture a hostage situation with the American public: A selfish murdering POS, and the equally selfish & self-promoting money-grubbin' media. This was a day of news that I could do without, one of the lowest of lows. We would have been better off if he just put a bullet in his head. Or was that all for theater too frocker?

But let me tell you how I really feel. KF
 
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