whatever said:
Heres some thoughts on it:
1. bloody thick spokes, let me know what length you need, I have up to 3.2mm dia but I might not have correct length.
That will pretty much solve the problem ( within some limits)
One of the OP's existing problems is loosening spokes. Thicker spokes loosen more easily, because they are not elastic enough to maintain tension under load. They don't make the rim any stronger, either.
2. once its relaced: tie together the spokes where they cross, it gives alot more strength to the wheel laterally.
This is an ancient wheelbuilding fallacy. Jobst Brandt used instrumented tests over 30 years ago to demonstrate that it isn't true. Not even a little bit. The only useful function of tied spokes is to hold broken ones in place to keep them from flopping around and getting stuck in the machinery.
3. you could consider going to 20" unless its too low, but will increase lateral strength alot
This is true. Also, inexpensive heavy duty rims are generally more available in 20" than in 26".
If you stick with 26" try find some old mountain bikes, alot of the old mtn bikes that get dumped have really wide/thick/steel rims, hard to buckle them
Steel rims used on normal bicycles are rolled from sheet metal. They are much heavier than most aluminum rims, but they are
weaker and less rigid. They are easier, not harder, to collapse. The only exceptions I have seen are the grotesquely thick steel rims used on Worksman industrial trikes, mopeds, etc. Those may be stronger and stiffer than most aluminum MTB rims, but only because they are several times heavier. They too are weaker on a strength-to-weight basis.
Double walled aluminum rims are the way to go, unless you're trying to work with salvaged parts and such rims are not available. I don't know what is widely available in Australia, but in the USA, Weinmann DM30 rims are available from almost any bike shop in 20" and 26" diameters, don't cost much (about $30 US at full retail), and are among the strongest in their price range. Alex DM24 rims are even better, but I understand their availability is diminishing.
I can't view the pictures to offer observations or advice, because they are hosted on Facebook.